Anne's Thoughts: Chapter 18: Evil as morality is the feeling of and the actions arising from that feeling of loss which occurs due to the illusion of being separated from the eternal ALLBEINGNESS of love so violence will continue to exist as long as the "I" feels the need to have enemies.
Sadly, when the "I" takes on human form, that person may feel the need to have enemies. As humans, we deal with morality, good and evil. Evil arises out of the feeling of and action arising from that feeling of loss which is due to the illusion of experiencing a separation from the eternal ALLBEINGNESS which is love. When we feel isolated, we cut ourselves off from the source which creates love. Love is never not in existence as it is the bonding of energy. What becomes the not is our ability to connect with the ultimate source of love.
When we no longer feel in direct contact with the ALLBEINGNESS, we rely upon our ego, a believer in the us against them, to protect us. "Evil exists internally, initiated within the confines of the deranged human mind" according to Michael Newton, Ph. D., as found on page 76 of his book entitled DESTINY OF SOULS: NEW CASE STUDIES OF LIFE BETWEEN LIVES, which was published by Llewellyn Publications located in St Paul, Minnesota, in 2003. The ego desires to make him/her/itself enormously important to each of us. In order to build up worldly power, each ego-self denigrates, to some degree, other egos. The human ego, the personality, wants other egos to praise, honor, reward, and provide services for him, her or it. When another personality does not do so at all or not well enough to satisfy the given ego, that human might be considered as an enemy. For a sick ego who dwells in the negative vibrations, the number of enemies could equal the power the ego feels s/he possesses. Recall the coups collected by some of the Native American tribes. Picture the record of kills scratched onto the weapons of many soldiers. Some personalities need, until the "I" decides to change, a counting of their enemies in order to build up themselves.
While I believe that each creature is doing the best that she or he can do at any given moment, I do recognize that some are doing the best they can to be evil due to being quite mistaken. Mark I. Rosen, Ph. D., explains the following on page 81 of his book entitled THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH A PAIN: SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE FOR DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE, which was published by Three Rivers Press in New York in 1998:
Some difficult people, a small percentage, are evil. . . . A truly evil person has four distinguishing attributes. First, an evil person engages in acts that cause harm--grievous, lingering, sorrowful harm. Evil is antithetical to life, love, and happiness. Second, an evil person commits acts that are consciously and intentionally repeated--the evildoer knows what she or he is doing each time. Evil is a deliberate plan of action. Third, an evildoer has a warped justification for his or her actions--in the depraved mind of the perpetrator, the victim is somehow deserving of this treatment. Evil is always targeted at someone else who is supposedly evil. An evildoer is utterly incapable of looking within at his or her own evilness and un- consciously projects it onto others and the environment. Fourth, an evildoer has no remorse.
However, most of the time, people who act in unloving ways "do what they do to other people because they hurt, they want, or they do not know" due to their own "suffering, deprivation, or ignorance" (87). Henry Ford explained what we consider to be evil as follows: "What we call evil is simply ignorance bumping its head in the dark." When we picture the so-called evil person as one stumbling in total darkness against the prison walls she or he has created due to his or her ignorant thoughts, that vision might make it easier for us to forgive him or her due to our realizing how much that person still has to learn.
Who are some of these people who appear as lacking the ability to love unconditionally? I know some people who have been diagnosed as having developed a borderline personality, which is characterized by extreme impulsiveness, instability of moods, relationships which are marked by chaos, and problems with self-image and behavior which includes not taking responsibility for one's actions. Because several people for whom I wish happiness have been diagnosed with this problem, I wish to define it in detail so that those of my readers whom I know personally as well as other readers who have encountered such personalities might, eventually, understand this disease somewhat better than they do presently. According to http://www.yschcental.com/disorderssx10.htm, one who suffers from Borderline Personality will likely present some of the following symptoms:
Impulsive behaviors and frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment
A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation
Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self
Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)
Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior
Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)
Chronic feelings of emptiness [a black hole, an abyss, which cannot be filled]
Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)
Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms
One of the traits often possessed by such people includes the need to have someone whom they consider to be against them, an enemy. Someone to whom the person who suffers from a borderline personality once felt close may become an enemy as soon as s/he disagrees with the person affected by borderline tendencies. The person who becomes the enemy may feel extremely confused due to the rapid switch from being in a close relationship to being accused of fantastic charges. I know this because, several times, I have found myself on the receiving end. The only way I see to deal with such people is to continue to act out of love both for oneself and for the other person. Specific suggestions as to how to handle such relationships can be found searching the internet looking under coping with borderline personality. Taking care of oneself must be done in order to take care of others. Robert Allen teaches us in his book entitled A THOUSAND PATHS TO ZEN, which was published by MQP in London in 2003, the benefits of acting out of a calm spirit: "Zen makes you accepting of other people, even if they are not accepting of you" (365). Rather than moving into needing enemies of one's own, I suggest continuing one's own journey by loving even more intensely. I admire what my then six-year-old granddaughter stated about one such person: "It is sad when she does not know she is loved." Yes, it is sad when the "I" does not know she or he is loved totally and forever.
Violence occurs when the ego needs enemies whether one has boderline tendencies or not. That violence may be against oneself or others. The ultimate violence against oneself may be suicide. I believe that the "I" whose recent body died due to suicide will still learn the lessons previously determined but will also have to learn the lessons concerning the loving of the physical body, the form taken by energy so that the "I" could experience life in material form. The person who releases an exceedingly sick body from having to suffer any longer when that suffering cannot be relieved and when that suffering serves no purpose may be acting out of love. However, in many cases, especially with the medicines and other treatments which exist today, the suffering can be relieved if the potential suicide victim seeks such relief from his or her symptoms. I hope that the person who considers suicide as a possibility allows others to do their best to help him or her. Of course, I hope that same thought for many others who have made themselves the target of their violence. I have taught self-cutters who relieve their terrible emotional feelings by slicing into their own bodies. I have read that college and university personnel are, presently, seeing a major increase in self-cutting, particularly regarding females; such mutilation is done, supposedly, to alleviate symptoms of anxiety. I have taught both males and females who suffered from anorexia which I view as violence against their own bodies. One of my students was raped and murdered by two young men, at least one of whom was rumored to be a hair eater, his own. Those who feel separated from love do find many ways to inflict violence upon themselves as well as upon others.
I do not want to list the many ways humans have invented to hurt other humans. I feel certain that humans will invent new ways in the future as we do not yet all know how to act in a nonviolent manner. During my now six decades within my current body, I have lived through the last half of the bloodiest century known to history. Hitler, definitely, serves as an example of an ego-self gone wrong. His need for violence caused the deaths of millions and, finally, his own. Although Hitler was a Lutheran, possibly with Jewish heritage, and closely connected with the Roman Catholics, he did not act out of the spirit of love. If asked, I feel certain he would have professed love for his version of hiscountry; however, he possessed only a very elementary knowledge of love. I hope his mother loved him. I hope that everyone's mother loves her offspring.
However, I fear not all children find themselves loved well enough to learn they are loved eternally. I fear not all adults find themselves loved well enough to learn they are loved eternally. Only a few humans have been able, since the development of the ego-self thousands of years ago, to feel the natural connection with the universal spirit of love. Since we do experience what we believe to be true, we need to be on target in our beliefs or we will suffer. Most humans sin--meaning to miss the mark--in regards to how the universe works so do suffer.
Thomas Moore has explored the problems we humans have regarding understanding the human choice concerning good and evil. He explains in the magazine entitled SPIRITUALITY AND HEALTH in the November/December 2004 issue on page 11 that we "do need the change in imagination that will save" us "from self-destruction and meaninglessness." He has noticed that when "morality remains in its naïve, undeveloped state of moralism, in which" one feels "compelled emotionally to be preoccupied with" one's "own anxious concerns" that the person tends to "project" his or her "moral anxiety onto the world and demand that people share" his or her "defensive and simplistic" concepts "of what is right and wrong" (11). He believes that each of us is capable of changing when we recognize the ultimate importance of "love" and make a "shift in the deep emotional and intellectual imagination" each of us possesses (11). We can make ourselves "outrageously forgiving and accepting" while acting out of the "rule of love rather than obligation" just as Jesus taught us to do (11). We can move beyond the simplistic and formalistic views of right and wrong that that our immature selves have chosen to believe. We can liberate ourselves so as to enjoy the freedom of living out of the spirit rather than the rule of law.
Undoubtedly, the major cause of suffering is the belief that we will die. The Buddha taught us that for all living creatures no thing can ever be permanent; thus, death must occur. I quote a translation of what the Buddha shared as Truth as found on page 107 of the Dalai Lama's book entitled ADVICE ON DYING AND LIVING A BETTER LIFE, which was translated and edited by Jeffrey Hopkins, Ph. D. and published by Atria Books in New York in 2002:
Some die in the womb,
Others at birth,
Still others when they can crawl,
Some when they can walk.
Some are old,
Others are adults,
Going one by one,
Like fruit falling to the ground.
I recall a jump-rope song: "Doctor, Doctor: Will I die? Yes, my child, and so will I." If one wishes to remain or, actually, to become sane, she or he must accept the fact of death. Sam Keen in LEARNING TO FLY, which was published by Broadway Books in New York in 1999, explains as follows as found on page 38: "There is a primal fear, what the existentialists called ontological anxiety, the fear of extinction, of the void, of nothingness, of death--that is an abiding climate in the bottom of the psyche." Doreen Virtue, Ph. D., on page 32 of her book called LOSING YOUR POUNDS OF PAIN: BREAKING THE LINK BETWEEN ABUSE, STRESS, AND OVEREATING, which was published by Hay House in Carlsbad, California, in 2002, explains as follows regarding what pain is and a way to move through it:
Existentialists believe that pain is an inevitable part of being human. A lot of pain . . . has to do with the knowledge that we will inevitably die and then be "nothing." . . . The best way to deal with this pain is to first acknowledge its existence. . . . Admit to yourself that you fear that your life will be meaningless. Then, . . . do something about it. You must create meaning in your life.
I believe that it is foolish to suffer pain due to the fear of death. Maybe those who see life as hilarious have a point. One of the incarnations of the Buddha earned the label of the Laughing Buddha. Laughter might be the most sensible response to much that happens to us. I quote Robert Allen from his book entitled A THOUSAND PATHS TO ZEN, which was published in London in 2003 by MQP: "Birth and death, coming and going--what a joke!" (344). We might as well respond to birth and to death, to coming and to going, and to all that occurs in between those two events with laughter. After all, if we are to be alive, then, both birth and death must occur. We are physical so subject to the pattern of creation and destruction which is the basic truth of the universe: All must change. We exist. We must change. Death is a change. Arthur Schopenhauer wrote these words which I found on page 237 of REINCARNATION: AN EAST-WEST ANTHOLOGY, complied and edited by Joseph Head and S,. L. Cranson and published by Aeon in Mamaroneck, New York, in 2000: "The personality disappears at death, but we lost nothing thereby; for it is only the manifestation of quite a different Being" as "when we die, we throw off our personality like a worn-out garment and rejoice because we are about to receive a new and better one." As to what this newness is, I can only trust that the universe will provide me and everyone else with all of the chances needed in order to learn how to love totally and completely. Since it takes the destruction of the physical body to reach the higher levels of vibration which means higher levels of love, I will accept what must be--death.
Although we developed the ego-self to serve and protect us, we modern humans have tended to let the face we present to the world become way too much of who we are. We tend to believe in the suffering of the ego, the story we tell ourselves and others about who we are, as the whole truth about ourselves. We forget that each one of us creates his/her own individual story. Since each sentient being creates his/her own story, we can change the direction of that story whenever we so decide. We can remind ourselves that "the kingdom of God is within you" (Luke 17:21). We can remind ourselves that we created the ego-self which has caused each of us to feel as if we no longer live in the "Garden" which serves as a metaphor for the ability to recognize that the "I" once did live and, actually, still does live, which we realize once we recognize the truth, in a place in which we must know we were, are, and always will be one with the all. We, obviously, did not deliberately set out to lose our connections with the source of love. Yet, that is what happened for most humans. Although the essential "I" cannot ever be separated from the all-penetrating ALLBEINGNESS, the ego-self can feel as if she/he/it is totally isolated and act accordingly. When the ego sees him/her/itself as the most important element of creation, that personality goes awry. I agree with Robert Allen, as sourced above: "Anyone can like nice, good-natured people. . . [;] but nasty people are Buddhas too" (365). We find it easy to despise or resent other people who have let their egotism get out of control. However, we tend to think others should simply allow us to do exactly that.
Thich Nhat Hanh, on page 115 of his book entitled ANGER: WISDOM FOR COOLING THE FLAMES, which was published by Riverhead Books in New York in 2001, explains that "most of our suffering is born from our lack of understanding and insight that there is no separate self" so the truth is that "the other person is you, [and] you are the other person." However, for far too many humans, the truth of interdependence is forgotten as the ego views only him/her/itself as the source and loses connections with the universal oneness. The stronger and noisier the ego-self grows, the less often the quiet and non-demanding intuition is heeded. The intuition, when it is heeded, serves quite often as the way the "I" and the spiritual helpers of the "I" make contact with the personality and the body. When the intuition is ignored, the human relies on the ego-self. The healthy "I" keeps the ego for use when needed and relies on the intuition and the other ways the spirits reach that "I" for making the most loving choice.
We can choose to eliminate the need for enemies and the resulting epidemic of violence for ourselves. We need to remember that the universe provides us with what we truly want so that applies to those who seek out any vision of evilness. Fred Alan Wolf, Ph.D. wrote the following on page 348 of his book entitled THE DREAMING UNIVERSE: A MIND-EXPANDING JOURNEY INTO THE REALM WHERE PSYCHE AND PHYSICS MEET, which was published by Simon and Schuster in New York in 1994:
If you have fearful images, they tend to come into reality: whatever you can imagine begins to appear as if we called it into existence--we are creating these images as realities because the universe . . . doesn't care what you produce. . . . Whatever you create as imagery . . . so will it be. Why? Because at the core of the universe, at its most fundamental level, it is not solid stuff. It is not hard reality. It is capable of forming reality into whatever our images produce.
What we image is what we get. We, I hope and trust, are capable of imagining the end of violence. We are capable of ending violence within ourselves. Thich Nhat Hanh, on page 128 of the book sourced above, explores this need for violence as follows:
Our enemy is not the other person. Our enemy is the violence, ignorance, and injustice in us and in the other person. When we are armed with compassion and understanding, we fight not against other people . . . but against the tendency to invade, to dominate, and to exploit.
He further explains that "being compassionate does not mean allowing other people to do violence to themselves or to you" but, rather, it means "being intelligent" because "non-violent action that springs from love can only be intelligent action" (129). How can humans release the need for violence and other types of evilness? The basic method must involve loving oneself and understanding that "compassion is born from understanding--understanding that the other person also suffers" (193). I see this happening individual by individual as each makes the choice to act out of loving-kindness rather than rage, anger, revenge, and other such negative emotions. We have role models including Thich Nhat Hanh and Thomas Moore who have taught us that we humans can decide to live a life filled with love. Neale Donald Walsh, who wrote the series entitled CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD, has recently created an action plan called The Group of 1000 which he hopes shall enable humans to choose not to act out of violence due to thinking for oneself. Maybe we can make ourselves into role models for others. Once enough humans make the choice to love, a new world view could come about.
Violence done by human against human can end; its ending is a human choice--a humane choice.
Anne's Thoughts: Chapter 19: Every breath, as well as heartbeat, and millisecond, creates the changing of the "I" and a chance to learn.
One of the great truths is that the "I" has a chance to learn with every breath, heartbeat, and millisecond because the "I" changes. Therefore, hope always exists. No person is doomed. One can make a different choice if one has previously made a not-so-good one. One can make him/herself into who s/he wishes to be. One can change his/ personal story.
Take a breath. You are now different from who you were before you took that breath. You contain new molecules of oxygen. You inhaled yet one more chance to learn what you chose to figure out before you were born. With every breath, you have a new opportunity. Obviously, a certain breath will be your last one while incarnated in your current body. Even that last breath does not stop your learning. However, that last breath ends your possession of your material form for this time period. What do you want to accomplish while in this body? What joys do you wish to experience? Every breath gives you another chance.
Observe your heartbeats. One will be the last one you experience in your current material form. Until that last one, you can change who you are while living in your body. You can create a new and improved you. Of course, you can also grow ever more negative if you so chose. I hope you do not make the choice for the worst life you can live because, then, you will not be as happy as you could be if you choose a more positive thinking style. Anytime the negative vibrations overwhelm you, remember that with the next heartbeat you can switch your attitude.
Truly, the "I" which is the eternal part of each of us is capable of learning everything necessary to move ever closer to understanding and acting out of love. We learn how to deal with earth-time while in our current bodies. However, I do not believe that earth-time applies to those existing at the spiritual level. I do know that, whether we are in a physical body or not, the "I" who wishes to learn will do so.
Think of who you were on the day before someone you loved died. Think of who you were the day after. Did you absorb the lessons taught by that death into your soul? Did you act differently with your family? With your co-workers? Did you move onto a negative and cynical path? Did you resent those who still had a relationship with a given loved one? Did you feel jealous? Did you move onto the positive and loving path? Did you nurture the relationships still available to you while in this body? Did you encourage others to nurture their relationships? Did you shut down or open up?
According to Michael Newton on page 51 of JOURNEY OF SOULS: CASE STUDIES OF LIFE BETWEEN LIFE, which was published in 2003 by Llewellyn Publications located in St. Paul, Minnesota, "the key to growth is understanding" that each of us is "given the ability to make mid-course corrections in our life and having the courage to make necessary changes when what" one is "doing is not working" (213).
Jonathan, my son, has expressed that I have to be the weirdest person he knows. Obviously, I wondered exactly what he meant. Upon my questioning him as to why he thought that, he responded, "Mom, you are weird because you accept everybody just as they are. Compliments come in many forms and not as often as most of us would appreciate receiving them--I happily accept "weird" as a self-description. I do not know anyone else who does that nearly to the extent that you do." I do recognize that I have used the grieving experiences that I have faced in my life, especially the deaths of my son, my husband, and my brother, to make myself into a person who chooses as often as I can remember to do so not to label and judge but, rather, who accepts whatever is. I know all who live must die. Usually, as a result of another's death, we tend to forgive that person for mistakes she or he made while living. My theory is why not forgive while that person is still alive. Better yet, why judge at all?
With every choice and every action, each one of us does make the choice as to who she/he is and will be. During some lifetime, one will learn the lessons she/he must know. In what manner and when is an individual choice.
When we no longer feel in direct contact with the ALLBEINGNESS, we rely upon our ego, a believer in the us against them, to protect us. "Evil exists internally, initiated within the confines of the deranged human mind" according to Michael Newton, Ph. D., as found on page 76 of his book entitled DESTINY OF SOULS: NEW CASE STUDIES OF LIFE BETWEEN LIVES, which was published by Llewellyn Publications located in St Paul, Minnesota, in 2003. The ego desires to make him/her/itself enormously important to each of us. In order to build up worldly power, each ego-self denigrates, to some degree, other egos. The human ego, the personality, wants other egos to praise, honor, reward, and provide services for him, her or it. When another personality does not do so at all or not well enough to satisfy the given ego, that human might be considered as an enemy. For a sick ego who dwells in the negative vibrations, the number of enemies could equal the power the ego feels s/he possesses. Recall the coups collected by some of the Native American tribes. Picture the record of kills scratched onto the weapons of many soldiers. Some personalities need, until the "I" decides to change, a counting of their enemies in order to build up themselves.
While I believe that each creature is doing the best that she or he can do at any given moment, I do recognize that some are doing the best they can to be evil due to being quite mistaken. Mark I. Rosen, Ph. D., explains the following on page 81 of his book entitled THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH A PAIN: SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE FOR DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE, which was published by Three Rivers Press in New York in 1998:
Some difficult people, a small percentage, are evil. . . . A truly evil person has four distinguishing attributes. First, an evil person engages in acts that cause harm--grievous, lingering, sorrowful harm. Evil is antithetical to life, love, and happiness. Second, an evil person commits acts that are consciously and intentionally repeated--the evildoer knows what she or he is doing each time. Evil is a deliberate plan of action. Third, an evildoer has a warped justification for his or her actions--in the depraved mind of the perpetrator, the victim is somehow deserving of this treatment. Evil is always targeted at someone else who is supposedly evil. An evildoer is utterly incapable of looking within at his or her own evilness and un- consciously projects it onto others and the environment. Fourth, an evildoer has no remorse.
However, most of the time, people who act in unloving ways "do what they do to other people because they hurt, they want, or they do not know" due to their own "suffering, deprivation, or ignorance" (87). Henry Ford explained what we consider to be evil as follows: "What we call evil is simply ignorance bumping its head in the dark." When we picture the so-called evil person as one stumbling in total darkness against the prison walls she or he has created due to his or her ignorant thoughts, that vision might make it easier for us to forgive him or her due to our realizing how much that person still has to learn.
Who are some of these people who appear as lacking the ability to love unconditionally? I know some people who have been diagnosed as having developed a borderline personality, which is characterized by extreme impulsiveness, instability of moods, relationships which are marked by chaos, and problems with self-image and behavior which includes not taking responsibility for one's actions. Because several people for whom I wish happiness have been diagnosed with this problem, I wish to define it in detail so that those of my readers whom I know personally as well as other readers who have encountered such personalities might, eventually, understand this disease somewhat better than they do presently. According to http://www.yschcental.com/disorderssx10.htm, one who suffers from Borderline Personality will likely present some of the following symptoms:
Impulsive behaviors and frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment
A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation
Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self
Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)
Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior
Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)
Chronic feelings of emptiness [a black hole, an abyss, which cannot be filled]
Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)
Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms
One of the traits often possessed by such people includes the need to have someone whom they consider to be against them, an enemy. Someone to whom the person who suffers from a borderline personality once felt close may become an enemy as soon as s/he disagrees with the person affected by borderline tendencies. The person who becomes the enemy may feel extremely confused due to the rapid switch from being in a close relationship to being accused of fantastic charges. I know this because, several times, I have found myself on the receiving end. The only way I see to deal with such people is to continue to act out of love both for oneself and for the other person. Specific suggestions as to how to handle such relationships can be found searching the internet looking under coping with borderline personality. Taking care of oneself must be done in order to take care of others. Robert Allen teaches us in his book entitled A THOUSAND PATHS TO ZEN, which was published by MQP in London in 2003, the benefits of acting out of a calm spirit: "Zen makes you accepting of other people, even if they are not accepting of you" (365). Rather than moving into needing enemies of one's own, I suggest continuing one's own journey by loving even more intensely. I admire what my then six-year-old granddaughter stated about one such person: "It is sad when she does not know she is loved." Yes, it is sad when the "I" does not know she or he is loved totally and forever.
Violence occurs when the ego needs enemies whether one has boderline tendencies or not. That violence may be against oneself or others. The ultimate violence against oneself may be suicide. I believe that the "I" whose recent body died due to suicide will still learn the lessons previously determined but will also have to learn the lessons concerning the loving of the physical body, the form taken by energy so that the "I" could experience life in material form. The person who releases an exceedingly sick body from having to suffer any longer when that suffering cannot be relieved and when that suffering serves no purpose may be acting out of love. However, in many cases, especially with the medicines and other treatments which exist today, the suffering can be relieved if the potential suicide victim seeks such relief from his or her symptoms. I hope that the person who considers suicide as a possibility allows others to do their best to help him or her. Of course, I hope that same thought for many others who have made themselves the target of their violence. I have taught self-cutters who relieve their terrible emotional feelings by slicing into their own bodies. I have read that college and university personnel are, presently, seeing a major increase in self-cutting, particularly regarding females; such mutilation is done, supposedly, to alleviate symptoms of anxiety. I have taught both males and females who suffered from anorexia which I view as violence against their own bodies. One of my students was raped and murdered by two young men, at least one of whom was rumored to be a hair eater, his own. Those who feel separated from love do find many ways to inflict violence upon themselves as well as upon others.
I do not want to list the many ways humans have invented to hurt other humans. I feel certain that humans will invent new ways in the future as we do not yet all know how to act in a nonviolent manner. During my now six decades within my current body, I have lived through the last half of the bloodiest century known to history. Hitler, definitely, serves as an example of an ego-self gone wrong. His need for violence caused the deaths of millions and, finally, his own. Although Hitler was a Lutheran, possibly with Jewish heritage, and closely connected with the Roman Catholics, he did not act out of the spirit of love. If asked, I feel certain he would have professed love for his version of hiscountry; however, he possessed only a very elementary knowledge of love. I hope his mother loved him. I hope that everyone's mother loves her offspring.
However, I fear not all children find themselves loved well enough to learn they are loved eternally. I fear not all adults find themselves loved well enough to learn they are loved eternally. Only a few humans have been able, since the development of the ego-self thousands of years ago, to feel the natural connection with the universal spirit of love. Since we do experience what we believe to be true, we need to be on target in our beliefs or we will suffer. Most humans sin--meaning to miss the mark--in regards to how the universe works so do suffer.
Thomas Moore has explored the problems we humans have regarding understanding the human choice concerning good and evil. He explains in the magazine entitled SPIRITUALITY AND HEALTH in the November/December 2004 issue on page 11 that we "do need the change in imagination that will save" us "from self-destruction and meaninglessness." He has noticed that when "morality remains in its naïve, undeveloped state of moralism, in which" one feels "compelled emotionally to be preoccupied with" one's "own anxious concerns" that the person tends to "project" his or her "moral anxiety onto the world and demand that people share" his or her "defensive and simplistic" concepts "of what is right and wrong" (11). He believes that each of us is capable of changing when we recognize the ultimate importance of "love" and make a "shift in the deep emotional and intellectual imagination" each of us possesses (11). We can make ourselves "outrageously forgiving and accepting" while acting out of the "rule of love rather than obligation" just as Jesus taught us to do (11). We can move beyond the simplistic and formalistic views of right and wrong that that our immature selves have chosen to believe. We can liberate ourselves so as to enjoy the freedom of living out of the spirit rather than the rule of law.
Undoubtedly, the major cause of suffering is the belief that we will die. The Buddha taught us that for all living creatures no thing can ever be permanent; thus, death must occur. I quote a translation of what the Buddha shared as Truth as found on page 107 of the Dalai Lama's book entitled ADVICE ON DYING AND LIVING A BETTER LIFE, which was translated and edited by Jeffrey Hopkins, Ph. D. and published by Atria Books in New York in 2002:
Some die in the womb,
Others at birth,
Still others when they can crawl,
Some when they can walk.
Some are old,
Others are adults,
Going one by one,
Like fruit falling to the ground.
I recall a jump-rope song: "Doctor, Doctor: Will I die? Yes, my child, and so will I." If one wishes to remain or, actually, to become sane, she or he must accept the fact of death. Sam Keen in LEARNING TO FLY, which was published by Broadway Books in New York in 1999, explains as follows as found on page 38: "There is a primal fear, what the existentialists called ontological anxiety, the fear of extinction, of the void, of nothingness, of death--that is an abiding climate in the bottom of the psyche." Doreen Virtue, Ph. D., on page 32 of her book called LOSING YOUR POUNDS OF PAIN: BREAKING THE LINK BETWEEN ABUSE, STRESS, AND OVEREATING, which was published by Hay House in Carlsbad, California, in 2002, explains as follows regarding what pain is and a way to move through it:
Existentialists believe that pain is an inevitable part of being human. A lot of pain . . . has to do with the knowledge that we will inevitably die and then be "nothing." . . . The best way to deal with this pain is to first acknowledge its existence. . . . Admit to yourself that you fear that your life will be meaningless. Then, . . . do something about it. You must create meaning in your life.
I believe that it is foolish to suffer pain due to the fear of death. Maybe those who see life as hilarious have a point. One of the incarnations of the Buddha earned the label of the Laughing Buddha. Laughter might be the most sensible response to much that happens to us. I quote Robert Allen from his book entitled A THOUSAND PATHS TO ZEN, which was published in London in 2003 by MQP: "Birth and death, coming and going--what a joke!" (344). We might as well respond to birth and to death, to coming and to going, and to all that occurs in between those two events with laughter. After all, if we are to be alive, then, both birth and death must occur. We are physical so subject to the pattern of creation and destruction which is the basic truth of the universe: All must change. We exist. We must change. Death is a change. Arthur Schopenhauer wrote these words which I found on page 237 of REINCARNATION: AN EAST-WEST ANTHOLOGY, complied and edited by Joseph Head and S,. L. Cranson and published by Aeon in Mamaroneck, New York, in 2000: "The personality disappears at death, but we lost nothing thereby; for it is only the manifestation of quite a different Being" as "when we die, we throw off our personality like a worn-out garment and rejoice because we are about to receive a new and better one." As to what this newness is, I can only trust that the universe will provide me and everyone else with all of the chances needed in order to learn how to love totally and completely. Since it takes the destruction of the physical body to reach the higher levels of vibration which means higher levels of love, I will accept what must be--death.
Although we developed the ego-self to serve and protect us, we modern humans have tended to let the face we present to the world become way too much of who we are. We tend to believe in the suffering of the ego, the story we tell ourselves and others about who we are, as the whole truth about ourselves. We forget that each one of us creates his/her own individual story. Since each sentient being creates his/her own story, we can change the direction of that story whenever we so decide. We can remind ourselves that "the kingdom of God is within you" (Luke 17:21). We can remind ourselves that we created the ego-self which has caused each of us to feel as if we no longer live in the "Garden" which serves as a metaphor for the ability to recognize that the "I" once did live and, actually, still does live, which we realize once we recognize the truth, in a place in which we must know we were, are, and always will be one with the all. We, obviously, did not deliberately set out to lose our connections with the source of love. Yet, that is what happened for most humans. Although the essential "I" cannot ever be separated from the all-penetrating ALLBEINGNESS, the ego-self can feel as if she/he/it is totally isolated and act accordingly. When the ego sees him/her/itself as the most important element of creation, that personality goes awry. I agree with Robert Allen, as sourced above: "Anyone can like nice, good-natured people. . . [;] but nasty people are Buddhas too" (365). We find it easy to despise or resent other people who have let their egotism get out of control. However, we tend to think others should simply allow us to do exactly that.
Thich Nhat Hanh, on page 115 of his book entitled ANGER: WISDOM FOR COOLING THE FLAMES, which was published by Riverhead Books in New York in 2001, explains that "most of our suffering is born from our lack of understanding and insight that there is no separate self" so the truth is that "the other person is you, [and] you are the other person." However, for far too many humans, the truth of interdependence is forgotten as the ego views only him/her/itself as the source and loses connections with the universal oneness. The stronger and noisier the ego-self grows, the less often the quiet and non-demanding intuition is heeded. The intuition, when it is heeded, serves quite often as the way the "I" and the spiritual helpers of the "I" make contact with the personality and the body. When the intuition is ignored, the human relies on the ego-self. The healthy "I" keeps the ego for use when needed and relies on the intuition and the other ways the spirits reach that "I" for making the most loving choice.
We can choose to eliminate the need for enemies and the resulting epidemic of violence for ourselves. We need to remember that the universe provides us with what we truly want so that applies to those who seek out any vision of evilness. Fred Alan Wolf, Ph.D. wrote the following on page 348 of his book entitled THE DREAMING UNIVERSE: A MIND-EXPANDING JOURNEY INTO THE REALM WHERE PSYCHE AND PHYSICS MEET, which was published by Simon and Schuster in New York in 1994:
If you have fearful images, they tend to come into reality: whatever you can imagine begins to appear as if we called it into existence--we are creating these images as realities because the universe . . . doesn't care what you produce. . . . Whatever you create as imagery . . . so will it be. Why? Because at the core of the universe, at its most fundamental level, it is not solid stuff. It is not hard reality. It is capable of forming reality into whatever our images produce.
What we image is what we get. We, I hope and trust, are capable of imagining the end of violence. We are capable of ending violence within ourselves. Thich Nhat Hanh, on page 128 of the book sourced above, explores this need for violence as follows:
Our enemy is not the other person. Our enemy is the violence, ignorance, and injustice in us and in the other person. When we are armed with compassion and understanding, we fight not against other people . . . but against the tendency to invade, to dominate, and to exploit.
He further explains that "being compassionate does not mean allowing other people to do violence to themselves or to you" but, rather, it means "being intelligent" because "non-violent action that springs from love can only be intelligent action" (129). How can humans release the need for violence and other types of evilness? The basic method must involve loving oneself and understanding that "compassion is born from understanding--understanding that the other person also suffers" (193). I see this happening individual by individual as each makes the choice to act out of loving-kindness rather than rage, anger, revenge, and other such negative emotions. We have role models including Thich Nhat Hanh and Thomas Moore who have taught us that we humans can decide to live a life filled with love. Neale Donald Walsh, who wrote the series entitled CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD, has recently created an action plan called The Group of 1000 which he hopes shall enable humans to choose not to act out of violence due to thinking for oneself. Maybe we can make ourselves into role models for others. Once enough humans make the choice to love, a new world view could come about.
Violence done by human against human can end; its ending is a human choice--a humane choice.
Anne's Thoughts: Chapter 20: The "I" must do his, her, or its own learning as long as that "I" feels separation from the wholeness of the ALLBEINGNESS of the pure energy of love.
Life would be so easy if we could just take a pill which would provide us with exactly what we need to know at that given time. Science fiction provides us with many examples of fast and simple ways to learn. However, reality demands otherwise.
The "I" must do his, her or its own learning as long as that "I" feels separation from the wholeness of the ALL-BEINGNESS of the pure energy of love. I believe that whenever energy takes on material form and develops an ego-self the illusion of separateness occurs. I, even, believe that a being at any level of the spirit world with which we humans can come into contact feels at least some separateness from the ultimate IAM because I visualize ever higher levels of vibrations stretching toward the purest energy manifested by absolute love--the bonding force which holds the basic matter of the universe together. According to the traditional story, even Jesus Christ cried out due to feeling forsaken by his spiritual father, his god. If a great teacher can feel separated from eternal love, even if just for a moment, I know we normal humans do feel so, probably for much longer than a moment and much more often than did/do the teachers who have chosen to incarnate.
I do not see this system as one involving cruelty. How can it be cruel for one to take responsibility for one's own learning? Obviously, the decisions made by any individual "I" acting out of his or her human ego-self may appear cruel to those of us still learning how to love. I agree with Michael Newton, Ph D., who wrote these words in his book entitled JOURNEY OF SOULS: CASE STUDIES OF LIFE BETWEEN LIFE, which was published by Llewellyn Publications in St. Paul, Minnesota, in 2003, as found on page 76: "Life can be cruel but it is of our making here on this planet." Hitler and his Nazi followers certainly committed cruel acts. Stalin inspired horrible things to be done in his name. Osama bin Laden convinced the Al-Qaeda to kill thousands. The killing fields of the Twentieth Century of the common era destroyed millions of human lives, creating, undoubtedly, the most murderous century in the history of humankind. Men and women can and do make cruel decisions when they pick the solution that leads towards hate and reject the answer to the problem that leads towards love.
Yet, I see the ultimate IAM as sending forth only love. I cannot envision any advanced being who would not choose to act out of love rather than hate. Energy wants to create itself into physical forms, at least in the current physical universe which is the only one we can study in a scientific manner. Yes, all creation involves destruction; but destruction does not have to involve deliberate killings of other human beings on this planet known as earth. I hope we can figure out how to change ourselves rather than continue to feel the need to either force others to change over to our viewpoint or to kill them.
Learning how to love, to make ourselves into beings who choose to act out of love, proves difficult but remains possible. We have role models available including Martin Luther King, Jr., Gandhi, the various Buddhas, Jesus, Mother Teresa, the Dali Lama, and certain of the saints from the various religions. Hopefully, many of us have members of our own families who chose to act out of love more often than hate. I use my beloved grandmother Gillfillan as a model of how to give love. She had learned. I recall her stating that she felt we make our own hell whenever we think or act out of anything except love. We discussed whether or not we make our own heaven. While not quite ready to give up her hope of a heaven in which she would find herself after her physical death, she tended to agree with me that our choices affect our living conditions. Choosing to think loving thoughts and to act in loving ways changes us in a positive manner.
Thus far, I have not succeeded in eliminating all of my nasty, negative thoughts; however, I have made myself better at recognizing many of my less-than-desirable ones. I realize that thoughts are energy created into a certain form by something or somebody. I believe that we not only create our own thoughts but can catch certain ones created by another "I" whether these are positive or negative. My granddaughter Grace, when she was six, shared with my son, her father, and me that she did not like a certain boy who is eight. When I asked her why, she responded that she did not like his face. Jonathan explained to her that we do not judge people by their faces. She responded that she knew that but did not like his face. I asked her if she meant how his face made her feel. She answered yes. I, then, taught her the word vibe. She knows that she does not like to spend her time with someone who issues forth negative vibrations. Today, I asked some adults who know this eight-year-old child what they thought of him. They responded that they no longer allow their boys to spend much time with this child because of what he does and how he acts. I know I try to spend as little of my time as possible within a negative-vibration zone. I have become rather good at identifying who will bring me down and have developed methods which usually work for me to protect myself from such personalities. If I must spend time within or near to a negative personality or area, I try to cleanse myself as soon as I can afterwards. I have found a few methods that help me feel as if I have cleaned up my spirit/soul. Drinking a glass of water can help me to wash out those feelings. Sending waves of positive energy from the ground up and over my body, over my head, and back down into my gut area helps. Sleep, enormously, helps me to cleanse myself, especially if I can release the negatives through my dreams. Obviously, writing helps me. I use meditation at times, especially, walking combined with deep and regular breathing. Each person, if s/he wishes to grow in a positive direction, must learn how to cleanse him/herself of the negative energies s/he encounters in his/her physical body unless one does wish to be risk being consumed by them. Some intuitive people believe that one of the experiences we might encounter after our physical deaths is a cleansing shower of positive energy sent forth by the spirits who help us adjust to no longer having a material form. Perhaps, such a lovely cleansing of the soul is a heavenly activity. I do know that while here on earth and, hopefully, while experiencing a spiritual energy level after this physical body dies that I prefer living within positive modes of thoughts rather than making my own hell.
Maybe that is what hell is--the astral plane where all of our negative thoughts remain forever. Do such negative thoughts burst forth only to be caught by someone? If we do not learn how handle the negative thoughts which float through our brains, if we let such thoughts affect our actions, we can make mistakes. Some murderers have reported hearing voices which demanded they kill. Do these voices arise in an astral hell which sends forth negative thoughts? Do some people due to chemical problems within their brains catch such messages whereas most of us just decide to let them pass on through? Is there a web of negative thoughts which captures some humans so that their thoughts stick to nastiness? Negative thinking certainly seems to create a hellish way of living.
Is this similar to those who state they hear a god's voice? Do they have a different chemical or structural quality to a part of their brains which makes them more prone than most of us to grab onto a heavenly thought? I recall reading that several scientists have discovered a particular section that might exist in brains of certain people prone to tune into a godly trance-type experience. Such a structure could explain why some humans believe they communicate with a god while others find it difficult to even understand what the idea of a god who communicates means. Is this quality an early evolutionary trait which only a few humans still possess or a newly developing one which many will have in the future of mankind? Could sounds and images that some consider as godly be part of a web of thoughts that exists on a high-vibrational plane?
What makes a few people lock onto hellish thoughts and a few others lock onto heavenly ones? Most humans can think of something really nasty that they would like to do to someone but do not act upon it and can, at some point, let such thoughts flow back into the hellish zones. Most humans can think of something really lovely that they could create or help to create but forget about it before they get around to doing it. When the "I" feels isolated, is that "I" more easily attracted to the negative vibrations while the person who realizes s/he is connected to other forms taken on by energy does not even find those thoughts flowing through his/her brain or if s/he does notice negative thoughts, images, etcetera they pass right on out of his/her brain waves?
Can we learn how to teach our physical brains to ignore the negative thoughts so as to let any that we note to just pass right on through? I suggest using phrased such as these: "Away from me!" or, to be more Biblical, "Be gone, you demon!" Can we learn to attract the higher-level thoughts and to keep them active in our minds? The more we act out of unselfish and compassionate love, the more likely we are to find ourselves spending time with loveliness. Think, therefore, on these things.
Remember that the universe provides us with what it thinks we desire. If we put forth that the ego is of extreme importance to us, the ego gets fed. If we catch and hold onto negative thoughts, more will flow our way because regarding thoughts we attract the style we put forth. If we sincerely desire to use our ego wisely in the physical world when we need to do so but to spend most of our time with positive thoughts while knowing our "I" coexists with the ultimate, we discover that ever more beauty, joy, bliss, loveliness, and other attractive conditions comes our way.
All feelings of separation are illusionary. Peel back the layers of the covering. See the truth for yourself. Know that you are not an isolated, lonely ego caught in a physical body. See the magic. See that you are one with every single thing as well as the no thing. See that you are the pureness of love which is, at the most basic level, the bonding of two forms of matter even if just briefly. You are made of love. I am made of love. The ALLBEINGNESS was, is, and always will be the purest form of love, the desire for bonding and creating which lasts eternally.
Anne's Thoughts: Chapter 21: The "I" is not lost when the "I" knows the truth but rather is lost when the self does not recognize the truth.
Life can be simple if we just allow it to be. Most of us refuse to do that. We develop an ego-self--the way we see ourselves including our personality traits; most of us want to see ourselves as separate from the others because we are special. In order to control our world, our personal ego-self creates just as all of the other egos have created. Truthfully, our essential selves are not our egos; but, since we do not recognize that truth, we remain lost as long as we continue to allow our egos to make all of our decisions. We can learn to know the truth that the "I" always exists. In order to use one's human body within a society, the "I" invented the ego-self; therefore, the "I"-self can reinvent the ego-self to be used just as a tool controlled by the "I" if we can place the "I" in touch with the intuition and, therefore, the higher-level vibrations of the spirit/soul world. Our extreme identification with the ego-face which we present to the world creates many of the problems each of us encounters.
The natural world exists in a manner which constantly changes. Many people symbolize the natural world as Mother Nature. Far too many call what are really acts of nature "Acts of God" as one can find out by just checking most homeowners' insurance policies. Sadly, the egos of most humans deny the fact that our physical bodies are part of the natural world. We face the same acts of nature as do the other creatures living in the universe. The earthquakes destroy us as well as the trees. We can die in a flood just as can the fish. We can sink into the mud and tar pits just as did some dinosaurs. Lightning, as just one example, kills humans every year. A lady in my hometown found herself struck by lightning as she touched her car door in the parking lot just after she had left work. Nature treats us just as if we were any other creature. Confusing nature with the ultimate ALLBEINGNESS forces us to think on a simplistic level so as to need to see causes beyond the physical level; cause and effect do make sense at the physical level up to a certain point. We do not need to seek a First Cause for nature other than the love which bonds--which I call the IAM. When we think of the ultimate spiritual vibration--which I sometimes call the ALLBEINGNESS--in a simplified manner, we confuse the physical laws with that which lies within or behind or under or as a ground for all that is physical.
Yet, we must understand that while in our physical bodies we are not separated from nature but are just another part of nature so subject to all natural occurrences. I recall being on a camping trip with my father and Jonathan, my youngest son, who was six at that time. We had decided to enjoy an all-day canoe trip on Sugar Creek in Indiana. We used a metal canoe which my dad had made basically incapable of being tipped over. My mother had dropped us off and returned to the campground for a day of rest without us around to bother her. Hours after we had started our trip, a terrible thunderstorm arose, one of those awesome ones that can be seen coming from a long ways off across the prairies. After hoping that it would bypass us and, finally, realizing that it would not, we looked for the nearest farmhouse. We saw one several miles away. We knew crossing the fields would expose us to as much of a threat as would anything else we might do. We pulled the canoe to the shore, jerked it up so it would not float off, and jumped out. As the rain pelted down so hard it hurt and the lighting struck overhead and all around us, we glanced up. We saw the tulip, maple, and oak trees with their branches waving wildly over a hundred feet above us. We looked down only to notice the far-spreading roots of those magnificent trees. We decided that since the trees would certainly attract the electricity that we might be better off in the canoe than sitting at their roots. Of course, being in the water was not a wise choice, either. Rather than being between a rock and a hard place, we were caught deciding between trees or water--neither a good choice. We did, eventually, reach the pull-in area at the Turkey Run campground where we were met by state-park workers who helped us drag the canoe quite high up the bank because a massive flood was chasing us down river. We lived to tell the tale of one of our experiences with nature. However, I do not think nature cared whether her lightning hit us or her trees. These bodies in which we dwell exist, change, and die just as do the physical bodies of all sentient beings--just as will the earth itself.
I know a dog named Hooter who lives in Evanston, Wyoming. Hooter does not bother creating a complicated ego. He, simply, loves himself, his world, and his people. Especially, he loves several rocks. He picks one weighing about ten pounds, moves it around until he feels satisfied, and, then, licks it with total abandoned joy, quivering and whimpering until something else grabs his attention. When taken into a mountainous area, he will spent up to two hours digging out a huge boulder which he tries to move. Hooter knows how to live in the moment so as to enjoy simple pleasures. He, within his doggie brain, knows how to seek out joy.
Think of the joy we can experience if we would just allow ourselves to be who we are. The truth is that our bodies are part of the natural physical world just as is Hooter's. Each "I" incarnated so as to enjoy experiencing having a physical body. Hooter, certainly, enjoys his doggy body. Jesus taught us about the joy experienced by the flowers in the field. Jesus taught us how to just be one with nature and not to fight against it while in our natural forms. Yet, far too many of us spend far too much time worrying, stewing, fretting, judging, criticizing, griping, complaining, whining, etcetera. As the famous Popeye taught us, we are what we are. Our physical bodies are a part of nature. We need natural experiences in order for our physical selves to be healthy. We need light. I open up my blinds and curtains unless the weather is so horrible that I need the protection from the extreme wind and cold which can occur in Illinois in the winter season. I was lucky in that my classrooms always had a wall of large windows. Sometimes, I found myself so engrossed in teaching that I did not recall what year it was; however, I always had light and trees to look at. Studies have proven that a hospitalized patient is able to be released sooner if his/her room has a view of nature. Even just having natural light enter the room proves advantageous. Some studies have shown that even pictures depicting natural scenes help our bodies to heal. Whenever we deny the truth that our bodies belong to the natural world, those bodies suffer. Hooter knows what he is. We need to know and deal with our physical selves.
The complex ego-self which each modern human chooses to develop in order to handle the social and work worlds wants him/her to feel separate from the others in these environments so that given ego-self can feel special, better than those who are not him or her. We need to remember that our egos do not construe a fair and just view of a given event but, instead, desire to see ourselves as being totally right and to place any fault upon another. We tend not to notice our own faults but rather to amplify those of others. "Why beholdest thou the mote that lies in thy brother's eye but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?" (Matt. 7:3). We need to recall that our eternal "I"-self created the complicated ego-self for a specific purpose--to cope in a society. According to the esoteric theories, "the ordinary self that goes throughout the day . . . [which] consists of your likes, dislikes, . . . social and familial role . . . status in society, . . . [and] physical drives and desires" serves as the ego which "is an internalized picture of the world and the sum of our experiences in dealing with this world"; Richard Smoley explained this concept on page 52 in his INNER CHRISTIANITY: A GUIDE TO THE ESOTERIC TRADITION, which was published by Shambhala in Boston in 2002. This ego-self has been called the "self' and "personality" according to Gurdijieff, and "ego" as well as "Self" with a capital letter according to Jung (78). No matter what name we use for this human trait, we must learn how to use the personality wisely. What Jesus taught was to unite the "I" which is our essence with the ego-self: "When you make the two one, you will become the sons of man" according to the Gospel of Thomas in verse 106). We can discover how to use the ego or personality as a support for the eternal "I" or the soul/spirit. Smoley, in the book quoted above, explains that this journey to the "center" of our essential and truthful selves is "'The Way'" which "was the earliest name given to Christianity" according to Acts (78). Using the ego in a spiritual manner allows the body to enjoy the physical world, the incarnated spirit to enjoy being within a body, and the eternal "I" to express the truth of infinite connection to the pure energy of love.
Why did the homo sapiens decide to develop what has become this enormously powerful ego-self? Apparently, some of our ancestors experimented with forming an ego-self. That ego-self, probably, served as a protective device beyond just the flight-or-fight level. When a stranger was encountered, one's feelings could be hidden behind an ego mask long enough to determine if either flight or fight would prove necessary. Fighting could result in injury or death to the body. Flight could, also, result in injury or death to the body. The stranger might follow so fight would still be needed. One could trip and fall while fleeing. Maybe, if a face which did not reveal the internal conflict were presented, one could, eventually, just walk away safely. Actually, this facet of humanness could also help in trading situations due to acting as an early poker face by not revealing what the trader truly thought of his or her goods in order to make the best deal possible. Gambling occurred early in our development as a species. Being able to hide one's feelings behind one's face presented by the ego would have served us well as we tossed the sticks, rocks, and carved nuts. The ego face does serve particularly well in reproductive situations, obviously. As soon as our species developed recognizable feelings, some of us learned how to hide those feelings. Some male asked, "Was it as good for you as for me?" Some female, quickly, learned how to respond, "Yes, dear!" no matter how she truly felt; after all, she needed him to stick around in case of pregnancy. Self-protection, sex, trade, gambling, and other social activities provided early humans with opportunities to learn how to put forward an ego face to disguise true feelings which might expose them to an undesirable situation.
At some point, a human forgot the true feelings that s/he had hidden under the ego face. Maybe dreams and trances resurfaced those truths. However, our ancestor who had forgotten who she or he truly was actually lived his/her days spent amongst other humans quite satisfactorily by presenting his or her safe ego face. Eventually, his/her descendents saw the ego face as the main way to interact with others and, sadly, even with one's self when alone. The ego-self, eventually, learned how to fill up the human mind with the chatterings of the so-called "Monkey Brain" which loves to compare and contrast him- or herself with the traits and possessions of others. The incarnated "I" was forgotten or ignored except for a few peak experiences which some individuals encountered. This evolutionary development of the ego-self worked extremely well. Society did develop. Civilizations developed. People living in cities had to learn how to cope with dealing with massive numbers of other people quite often. The personality or ego face protected our ancestors so that they could live their daily lives. The ego-self became powerful and enjoyed the power so desired to keep it.
Certain spirits did choose to incarnate in order to teach the massive numbers of humans with overly powerful egos needed lessons. All of those incarnated spiritual teachers had to suffer due to having the physical body die. Jesus, according to legend, had only thirty-three years in his chosen body. The first Buddha had over twice that long. The truth is that all physical bodies must die. Both Buddha and Jesus, incarnated spiritual beings, taught the rest of us humans about the truth of who we are. I fear both found their messages corrupted rather quickly after their deaths, if not, actually, before. Yet, those who seek the truth, who absolutely want to know, find it. No thought once created is ever lost. The connection with the truth just must be made by each of us. In order to make that connection between the created ego or personality and the "I" which is our spiritual truth, one must discover the still and sweet spot that serves as the center of being. Smoley explains that this sweet spot is what Jesus called "the eye of the needle" which indicates that propping oneself up with an overly large and "pompous self-image" makes finding the essential "I" difficult (78-79). The human race has been taught by the truly great incarnated spiritual beings various methods as to how to control or to bypass or to eliminate the ego-self so as to discover the essential and eternal "I" that lives within each one of us. The task may prove difficult to achieve but can be done as some have reached this goal.
The teacher of Sufism known as Abu Yazid Bistami who died in 874 of the Common Era "approached the core of his identity" and discovered that "nothing stood between God and himself" because "everything that he understood as ‘self' seemed to have melted away" according to page 226 of A HISTORY OF GOD, written by Karen Armstrong and published by Gramercy in New York in l993. Abu Yazid Bistami understood that there "was no external deity ‘out there'" which could be "alien to mankind: God was discovered to be mysteriously identified with the inmost self" as "the systematic destruction of the ego led to a sense of absorption in a larger ineffable reality" which "was not a separate, external reality and judge but somehow one with the ground of each person‘s being" (226-227). By controlling or even eliminating the ego-self, one can put oneself in touch with the truth.
Do we want to know the truth, or do we want to remain under the ego's control? Do we want to live a simple life knowing our source of all joy and happiness lies within us? Do we want to understand our connection to the IAM, the ALLBEINGNESS? We get what we want once we know what it is we truly want because we can send forth our intentions to the universe or, in other words, pray. The truth will set us free--free of the ego's control.
Anne's Thoughts: Chapter 22: The "I" when merged with the ALL-BEINGNESS becomes a not thing but still remains one with the great IAM; losing the material form taken by energy results in the chances to learn even more lessons as we grow towards recognizing ourselves as love.
Being in the form of a thing, a human thing, we fear existing as a not thing. Most of us fail to understand that the "I" when merged with the ALLBEINGNESS becomes no-thing but is still the great IAM and that losing the material form taken by energy results in the chances to learn even more lessons as the "I" grows towards recognizing the "I"-self as love. Actually, even in the form of a thing, the "I" remains what the "I" has always been and always will be--love. Love includes energy's taking on continually changing forms. Love is being, ultimately, including the bonding of two or more of those forms at whatever vibrational level at which they exist.
I love to study Krishnamurti's works. I quote the following from KRISHNAMURTI: 100 YEARS, which was composed by Evelyne Blau and which is a Joost Elffers Book published in New York in l995:
What does it mean to die? To give up everything? Death cuts you off with a very sharp razor from your attachments, from your gods, from your superstitions, from your desire for comfort . . . and so on and on. . . . It means to be totally free, to be totally unattached to everything that man has put together or what you have put together--totally free. No attachments. . . . While you are living every moment you are dying . . . so that throughout life you are not attached to anything. That is what death means. (254)
Right on, Master K.!
I have noticed many practicing Christians who fear death extremely more than I, who practice no religion, do. Michael Newton, Ph. D., discovered himself "surprised to find that many people who held quite traditional religious views seemed to be the most fearful of death" according to page 12 of his book entitled DESTINY OF SOULS: NEW CASE STUDIES OF LIFE BETWEEN LIVES which was published by Llewellyn Publications in St. Paul, Minnesota, in 2003. I ponder especially regarding those who do not want death o come to their loved ones despite extreme levels of illness and the related high levels of distress and pain. As an example, I have known for decades an elderly man who served his Lord for most of his adult life as a minister; according to the story I was told, he became quite ill to the point of death recently. I have the understanding that both he and his second wife accepted that they and everyone else must die. I have been informed that she possessed the DNR papers but that his daughter could not allow herself to let him die during his several severely ill states. He did recover and return to his home where he, currently, ministers to the residents in his senior-citizen apartment building as well as being a contributing member of his church and community. In fact, he is still living several years after his extremely severe episode. However, my point is that I do not understand why she so dreaded losing him to death since she professes to believe in Jesus Christ as her Savior. Her religious father, if anyone can do so, should enter into the Christian Heaven. Does she fear missing his physical presence? She did and does visit him regularly. Does she have some unresolved issues? If so, I hope she has resolved them by now because at some point she and he will die. Does she fear that her version of Heaven does not exist? Does she fear that her Savior did not or will not save her father? Does she fear his nonexistence? I do not know. I cannot enter into someone else's mind. I can just observe and ponder upon such questions in order to seek answers for myself.
My husband and I did not fear considering various issues related to death and had discussed what conditions we found acceptable and unacceptable concerning how we would choose to live out our last days and hours. We each had signed our living wills, carried them in our wallets, and updated them regularly with a new year and a signature. We had agreed that the other was not to accept the medical staff's putting in a feeding tube unless the law gave the caregiver no choice. Several days after Ron's initial stroke, he could not pass the choke test. A doctor suggested I consider a feeding tube. On the way for yet another test, a hospital technician asked me if I knew that at that time in the State of Illinois the one with medical power of attorney did not have to agree to the insertion of a feeding tube. Knowing Ron's wishes, I decided not to have him undergo that procedure. I knew that I would miss his physical presence greatly after being married for decades. I, also, knew that I would do my best to fulfill his wishes and do feel I did do so. Actually, he recovered his ability to eat pureed foods within a few days and, eventually, could enjoy a soft-food diet. Ron loved to eat so I loved to see him once again able to use his less damaged arm and hand to feed himself during the last few weeks of his life. In fact, he feed himself a lunch just minutes before he died in his bed.
I lost a long-time friend due to my decision not to insert a feeding tube into the body of my husband who had ordered me not to do so and whom I had ordered not to do so for me. Presently, my son knows I do not want one inserted into me and vice-versa. My friend did not discuss her problems concerning my decision with me. Rather, she responded to me, after I had asked her to meet me for a meal in our hometown as a break on my trip between the hospital and my house, by providing various excuses. After calling one afternoon at four and a few weeks later at nine and being informed both times that she had just eaten, I did not make another call regarding joining together for a meal. I, finally, comprehended the message that she did not want to spend any more time with me; however, I, at that time, did not understand why. I just knew that I did not have the energy to worry about my relationship with her. Within a few hours after my husband had died after eating his last meal, I called her. When she once again refused to spend time with me even after my husband had died, I never called her again; however, I did see her a few weeks later on a street of our small town. I ran up, gave her a hug, and wished her well because I did and still do wish her happiness. About a year later, my son did contact her because I, finally, had found out that she had shared with a few people who had shared with a few people, one of whom, eventually, shared with me (Remember, that I do live in a small town!) that she had decided that I had deliberately chosen to starve Ron to death. My son's explanations did not help the situation except for allowing him to express his feelings to her. I wish she could have visited my husband in the residence home located only a few miles from her house. Ron would have enjoyed her visits. I would have enjoyed her visits. She could have seen him enjoy feeding himself. I could still have her as a friend. How pitiful it is when we judge due to the ego's fear of death.
Every living creature must die. Not one of us can remain in our bodies beyond a limited time. Krishnamurti, from the same source quoted above, explained as follows: "Living is dying. . . . Living means that every day you are abandoning everything that you are attached to . . . . Each day is a new day. Each day you are dying and incarnating. There is tremendous vitality . . . . [There is] energy there because there is nothing you are afraid of. There is nothing that can hurt. Being hurt doesn't exist" (254).
Honestly, I have not advanced myself to the stage of enlightenment that this man whom I admire greatly had reached. However, I do find myself enjoying the flow of just being to an ever-increasing extent. While I hope to enjoy being in this body for a few more decades, I believe that losing this body to which I have become quite attached does not mean the end of the "I" which knows eternalness. I do not like pain but know that all pain passes, eventually, even if that requires the death of the body. If there is just a state of nothing, if energy just returns to energy, and if no "I" continues to exist after the death of the physical body, so what? The pain still has ended. There would be no "I" left to be concerned with the body's destruction. If no "I" remains, there is no "I" who can experience any problem. Absolute nothingness means no consciousness so no concerns--not a bad deal considering the pain many suffer over a period of time before their actual dying. Think of the commercial: NO FEAR!
Death causes the destruction of the physical body. With the death of the physical body, the ego-self must end. We can practice little deaths for the ego-self so that the big death will not scare it so much. When the "I" learns how to let the ego-self take care of only the ego's little jobs at which it is quite good, the ego shuts down when not needed. Ideally, the "I" is in charge; the "I" uses the ego. The "I" knows the eternalness of love. The ego only knows a certain level of self love. Most people's egos even allow a certain amount of damage to be done to their bodies in order to build up the ego-self. For example, an ego might encourage his or her physical body to smoke, to drink too much alcohol, to consume certain other drugs, to drive too fast, or to do any of the possible risk-taking activities available to that body in order to make itself feel like a big deal. The physical body finds him or herself addicted. According to Robert M. Alter with Jane Alter on page 121 of THE TRANSFORMATIVE POWER OF CRISIS: OUR JOURNEY TO PSYCHOLOGICAL HEALING AND SPIRITUAL AWAKENING, which was published by Regan Books in New York in 2000, "an addiction is an attempt to find happiness, peace, love, and enchantment outside ourselves . . . [whereas they can only be] found inside ourselves." These writers further explain that "the essence of all additions and all addictiveness is fear, and the essence of fear is the feeling that you are totally alone in the universe" so the answer is that "when . . . we learn to reach in" ourselves for love "our addictions end" (123). Probably, one reason young people of adolescent age take so many risks is due to the big build-up of the ego-self during the teen years as this growth moves one away from the feeling of being one with the universe. The newly formed face which one presents to the world wants to find out exactly how far it can push the physical form. The ego-self not only enjoys the thrill of the risk-taking but also the bragging so often done after such experiences. By looking at the statistics associated with injuries and deaths of those in their teens and twenties, it becomes obvious the ego-self can and does push the body to its extremes. In fact, an out-of-control ego-self can cause an early death of the body and, therefore, of that ego--that personality; the ego-self does not understand that this will happen. The ego-self believes that the personality is immortal because, after all, the ego is so important and special that it must continue. The truth is that the personality, the ego, must die just as the physical body must do. Only the spiritual "I" exists eternally.
If the human ego-self had originally developed with one of the key functions involving the protection of the body, why does that part of each human, sometimes, push the physical body to the point of self-destruction? The ego-self seems to have grown into a monstrous state over the thousands of years of human evolution. Once the ego-self had learned to like power, it desired ever more of it. The ego-self moved into areas beyond any original reasons for being. Apparently, the "I" let the ego-self take over many functions involved with the physical body and, even, with the lower levels of the spirits connected to the physical form. Since at the level of thought, like attracts like, ego attracts ego. Ego energy attracts ego energy. Like a fungus, one's ego can start small and end up as a monster.
Since ego energy attracts ego energy, we have enormous problems with relationships. We have not yet learned or have forgotten the keys to being truly supportive: "Give without wanting anything in return, not even recognition or acknowledgement" and "allow yourself to see those whom you're supporting as already being whole and perfect as they are . . . and completely equal to you" so that you "allow them to be who they are--[meaning to] grant them their beingness--as opposed to seeing them as imperfect and needing to be fixed or helped"; this advice can be found on page 401 of the THE SEDONA METHOD: YOUR KEY TO LASTING HAPPINESS, SUCCESS, PEACE, AND EMOTIONAL WELL-BEING, which was written by Hale Dwoskin and published by Sedona Press in Sedona, Arizona, in 2003. Since egos are extremely active by the time most modern humans join together in some type of marriage, most encounter a less-than-perfect situation. Since marriages for "love" came about, the two in love are pulled together by their chemicals and, undoubtedly, as a female relative of mine indelicately states, by the "pussy-dick" drive. Of course, the "need to breed" is not only physically driven but also ego driven. The ego wants a little child who is a "chip off of the old block!" Far too often in a relationship, each person's ego-self seeks power over the other. Michael Newton, Ph. D., explains what we must learn on page 250 of his JOURNEY OF SOULS: CASE STUDIES OF LIFE BETWEEN LIFE, which was published in 2003 by Llewellyn in St. Paul, Minnesota: "The lesson we must learn from human relationships is accepting people for who they are without expecting our happiness to be totally dependent upon anyone." We alone are responsible for our happiness.
Some mates can agree upon a division of power within the relationship situation, whether it has been made legal or not. Each ego might be able to shine within a given area. Problems arise when the areas intersect or one person must take over the other's area due to absence, illness or any other such major life change in the couple's daily habits. I know of some families of cross-country truck drivers who cope fine until the driver remains home for a long period of time. The families of soldiers and other workers who find themselves stationed overseas may find a clashing of the personalities when the father or mother returns home. Currently, I know of a young man who is working on a gas-well site in the Rifle area of Colorado which is several hours from his home. He communicates by cell phone as he only has three hours off during each twenty-four hour period. He will spend up to six straight weeks on a site located hours away from home. At least with modern technology, the separated couple can still stay in touch with each other. Once the ego-self finds an area in which to feel powerful, it finds it hard to give up that area within the relationship. Sometimes, the two who once found themselves in "love" need help in order to figure out how to continue to live together. The ego-self must adjust when bonding with another ego-self--most likely, on a continual basis. Joshua Mack on page 129 of his book entitled WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT, which was published by Fair Winds Press in Gloucester, Massachusetts in 2002, explains as follows:
True love is not possessive but all-encompassing and includes loving the life . . . that is independent of you. You love . . . when she or he is mad, sad, happy, funny, weird, semi-embarrassing, dorky, annoying, dreamy, boring, exciting, reserved, flamboyant, and the biggest thorn in your side. We love . . . [others] for their essence . . . [so as to enjoy] simply [letting] them be themselves.
We help ourselves greatly when we remember that the eternal spiritual "I" always knows love at least at some level and is always available to influence the ego-self.
A great example of a modern-day situation in which family members encounter the clashing of egos is a cross-country car trip. While traveling for the last two months, I have encountered people who look exhausted due to more that just a normal day's journey. The weary traveling couple may have faced the stereotypical problems of "he refuses to ask for directions" and "she absolutely cannot read a map." Egos even create arguments over how often to stop for a rest break. I never could get my husband to understand why my bladder works the way it does. One of our family's classic stories involves my asking Ron to find me a rest room while we were driving on the Tri-State in the Chicago area. We, finally, came to an agreement that when I made such a request I truly needed the first one available no matter what condition it was in; believe me, I have used some nasty ones! The ego with a need to be frugal definitely clashes with the ego who just wants a good meal despite the costs. I recall having ridden with someone who ran out of gas while looking for the cheapest price per gallon. I have learned to use two catch-all phrases for when my ego-self does not care or I decide not to push the issue. Feel free to use these or to find your own. "Whatever" works well for when I do not have any or at least not much of a preference. "Whatever you say" works well for when I know what my ego-self would prefer but do not wish to pursue the issue at that given time. While these work well under many circumstances, I have found them of particular use on long car trips. I attempt to save my ego energy for situations about which I really care, especially when it involves a rest stop!
I tend to think that we spend far too much time and energy in our modern society building up what I call unearned so undeserved self-esteem or "fake" egos. We need to teach our young people when and how to use the ego-self effectively and efficiently and how to click it off or move beyond it for while. Think, again, of a family car trip. I recall one from Northwestern Illinois back home to East-Central Illinois. Jeffrey was eight so Jonathan was about four. Our old car might have had lap belts in the front but certainly none in the back-seat area. In those days, kids did not have to be placed in car seats. As I recall, we had a used kid's seat that we hung on the front bench seat. I still have a tendency to throw out my inside arm to prevent a child from flying into the dashboard and through the window. For some reason, my generation actually thought that tactic would work--probably because that is what our parents and grandparents had done to protect us. On that trip, we put one son in the front with us for a while. Then we switched who rode in front. We put both in front. We put both in back. I recall at more than one point looking in the back seat only to find one of the boys in the back window area lying on the shelf. They fought: "He put his finger on my side!" "He looked at me!" "He touched me!" "He hit me!" Finally, Ron made the infamous statement which no parent ever lives up to fulfilling: "We will never go on a trip again!" He asserted his ego for all of the good that actually did. As I recall, one of the boys finally fell asleep. Our sons had not yet learned how to just let it be. Neither had my husband, at least at that point of his exhaustion.
Our egos not only attract other egos but seem to enjoy controlling and, even, attacking other egos. Jeffrey and Jonathan's fighting in the car serves as an example of young egos who want to control not only their own physical areas but what the other person does. How is this any different from the male adult who needs to convince his mate that he has the right to handle the remote control? How is this any different from the woman who decides she and her mate need to talk in the middle of his favorite show? The major difference is that Jeffrey and Jonathan were eight and four at the time of that situation. Because Jeffrey died when Jonathan was six, Jonathan became an only child. My brother's son Douglas and Jon spent a great deal of time together. Doug was, also, an only child at that time. Those two, apparently, had made an unspoken agreement to use each other as a means to test their rapidly growing egos. They took on the job of fighting in the car. Once, after I had pulled off of the road, I jerked them both out of a jeep along I-65 north of Indianapolis to discuss what I expected not to occur again. They reached a point at which their Grandmother Johnson could not handle them both together. During one of Doug's week-long stays at our house, I had to leave them at my mother and father's home for a few hours. I discussed quite seriously with each of them alone and together that their grandma could not stand their fighting. When I picked them up, she had only praise for their behavior. Each of them, while we stood in my mom's house, assured me they had behaved excellently! I felt so proud of them. My ego felt as if I had solved the problem! Wow! Yea, wow! As soon as we were all three in my car and I was turning it around in my parents' drive-way, the hitting and yelling started. I yelled. Together, in unison, I heard these words: "But you only told us not to fight when we were with grandma!" Yep, that is what I had ordered them to do. My ego-self found she did not have that situation under control.
The ego-self certainly has a role to play when the spirit incarnates into the modern human body. We need to learn how to use the ego-self so as to make the most out of our lives but to not let the ego control everything as s/he would love to do. The ego-self tends to narrow us down to living in the well-trodden paths s/he knows best so feels s/he can control easily. The ego-self is not easily adjustable so wants his/her decisions to be the right ones. The ego-self keeps us locked into an earlier choice that may no longer serve our growth process. We fight for what the ego once thought to be right so still thinks must be right long after evidence proves it no longer useful or even wrong. In order to move towards the bonding involved with enjoying additional loves, the ego needs to give up control over certain areas. This can prove extremely hard. Actually, the ego-self needs to be put in its place. I used its here rather than his or her because we grow when we use the ego or personality as a tool and do not make the face we present to the world all of our selves.
Keeping the ego in its practical small area can have powerful consequences. When the ego does not control all of our experiences, we find energy and time for truly spiritual ones. When we do not have to seek out the approval of others on a constant basis, we find time to notice in what ways we approve of ourselves. When we do not have to continually prove our ego-selves as being right, we can explore other options. When we can stop the ego from bragging, we can do something new--a task with which the ego might feel quite uncomfortable. When we can discover how to practice the little deaths of the ego, we prepare ourselves for the big death. When the body goes, so does the ego.
Learning how to achieve our goals while in incarnated form prepares us for continuing to learn when in the "I" exists only in spirit. The only difference is no body and no ego. The "I' existed long before taking on a physical body and continues to exist eternally once created. Some lessons require a physical body. Some do not. Love wins over all soul "I's" eventually. Do you want your ego-self to hinder you in the progression of learning your lessons? The ego-self easily can do so simply by your letting the ego-self take over from your calm, peaceful, patient, non-controlling "I" who never acts aggressively. You will learn the lessons. It is your choice when and under what conditions including in what body or in no body. When you are ready to bond, which means to love, with the ultimate spirit of the universe which I call the IAM or the ALLBEINGNESS--from which the "I" has actually never been separated, you realize that pure energy continues to surround and penetrate every single thing and every not thing with love. ALLBEINGNESS is beyond male and female. ALLBEINGNESS is the ground of every thing and every not thing.
Anne's Thoughts: Chapter 23: The enlightened can choose to take form in order to help the "I" who is still under an illusion of separation so that "I" may learn.
Thankfully, we do not have to do everything totally on our own. While we are responsible for our own learning, we are never without help. All beings exist within a communal basis. The enlightened can choose to take form in order to help the "I" who is still under an illusion of separation so that "I" may learn.
Actually, the "I" who imagines him/herself as totally on his/her own only needs to make just one small connection to the whole in order to move out of extreme loneliness. The spirits want that "I" to do so. Therefore, ways to do so are put forth for the "I" to use in order to relate to the wholeness of the universe. Images and symbols abound. "Jean-Paul Sartre" who defined imagination as "'the ability to think of what is not'" believed that we "human beings are the only animals who have the capacity to envisage something that is not present or . . . does not yet exist but which is merely possible" according to page 233 of A HISTORY OF GOD: THE 4000-YEAR QUEST OF JUDAISM, CHRISTIANITY AND ISLAM, which was written by Karen Armstrong and published by Gramercy in New York in l993. "The only way we can conceive of God, who remains imperceptible to the senses and to logical proof, is by means of symbols, which is the chief function of the imaginative mind to interpret" (233). As I taught my English students for almost four decades, the word symbol refers to an object or a notion that we humans can perceive with one or more of our senses or grasp with our minds but in which we see something other than itself. Our poets and other artists point us towards the truth of our oneness with all. For example, Walt Whitman, a poet whom I believe to be an enlightened being who incarnated in order to help the generations who hear and read his works, found eternity in a blade of grass and himself in every other human being. He did so while incarnated in human form; therefore, we can do the same.
Armstrong explains that "as in art the most effective religious symbols are those informed by an intelligent knowledge and understanding of the human condition" (234). Consider the symbol of the circle. We wear a sign of eternity around our fingers. The cycle never ends. The material universe that we know at this present time once clashed into another universe on a slightly different vibration level and will do so again and again and again. The circle indicates that we are part of the never-ending cycle.
Consider the triangle. Each of us came from a male and a female who created a child. Each of our parents came from a mother and a father who created a child. These triangles led us back to the original homo sapiens and, even, further back to the common ancestor we share with the ape families. Imagine a top of the triangle millions of years ago dividing with each generation with you down towards the bottom line along with billions of your relatives. The triangle shows us our connections with every other human as well as with all of our ape relatives. Move further back with the image of the triangle. We find a connection with all mammals. Further back yet, we find the commonality of all land creatures. Even behind that, we find the common ancestor who lived in a sea. By imagining a scene from billions of years ago, we might see a meteor bringing in an element needed for the creation of life on earth. Yes, we could glance at the triangle in order to see our connections to all sentient beings on earth.
The Christians have made excellent use of the triangle to stand for the father, the child, and the holy spirit, the female. The Roman Catholics have better retained the feminine side of the trio than have most of the protestants. I feel than much damage occurs to the female psyche and, therefore, to the family when religions deny the equal importance of the female with the male whether as the mother or as the daughter. Perhaps we women need to ponder upon the triangle in order to see that we, in its shape, are absolutely as important as the male. Think of the upward pointing part of the triangle as the symbol of the male force, the rising up of hope, the desire for unity. Consider the downward pointing section as the symbol of the female, of the womb where new life forms and from which that life emerges to become a new individual formed from the male and female. The two parts put together, pointing upward and downward symbolize our union with the divine which creates. Of course, we are the divine which creates. Note: I realize that modern techniques have changed the way some young mammals are brought into this world. However, unless cloning occurs, both a male and a female are still needed in some manner even if as a donor of the sperm or the eggs. I like this triangle image.
Consider a fruit and its seeds. The ancient writer of the traditional legend of Adam and Eve used a fruit as the symbol of the knowledge provided by the tree of life. The translators, eventually, considered this fruit as an apple even though what we call apples did not grow in the area where the biblical couple were alleged to have produced their young. Think of the apple with its protective skin, its succulent fruit, and its seeds deep in the middle. The tree produces flowers which attract the insects which fertilize it. The fruit develops in the northern spring, grows through the northern summer, and falls in the northern fall. Thus, the tree serves as a symbol for life, death, and resurrection, the cycle of life as long as this version of the earth continues to exist. John Swanson explains that "trees are symbols of life, abundance, creativity, generosity, stability, uprightness, and strength" (http://wwwecopsychology.org/journal/gatherings7/treesjnhF.htm). In my yard in Illinois, many of the apples rot. The foxes and other mammals eat them. The feces these mammals leave on their travels contain seeds. Some find the proper conditions to create new trees. Life goes on.
Ancient Christianity made use of several fruit symbols. The vineyard is mentioned several times in the old myths and legends. The vine symbolizes the giver of the essence of life, blessings, abundance, fertility, and vitality; in fact, the grape is full of vitamins and minerals needed for a healthy life. In his book entitled INNER CHRISTIANITY: A GUIDE TO THE ESOTERIC TRADITION, which was published by Shambhala in Boston in 2002, Richard Smoley explains regarding "the parable of the sower and the seed and the workers of the vineyard" that "the vineyard" serves as "a symbol" standing for the "wine of the spirit"' being "produced" by those who teach and initiate the students who are ready to learn (220). Thus, grapes and wine often refer to the spiritual level of human development.
Consider the story of the wedding at Cana which Jesus attended near the beginning of his public teachings which is full of symbolism. Actually, this tale of a wedding and the serving of the wine is a retelling of an ancient sun-god myth, just as are many other of the Jesus stories; according to Barbara Walker on page 464 of THE WOMAN'S ENCYCOLPEDIA OF MYTHS AND SECRETS (sourced elsewhere in this document), the biblical version of the story is copied from the religious rites of the ancient god known as Dionysus who was, in turn, based upon the Egyptian god called Osiris. In order to be claimed as the son of god--the sun-god, Jesus had to be shown to produce wine from water just as had the other versions of the redeemer. "The sun [son] changes water into wine when, following the rain, the grapes . . . ripen on the vine" which "represents new life springing from the old" and after being harvested, "ferment in the heat' so the "red" of the "wine" became the symbol for "blood" which represents the essence or "fullness of life" so, thus, "the very presence of [a] god" (http://paganizingfaithofyeshus.netfirms.com). So how does this this ancient story shows us how to move beyond the ego-self? "Only the true ‘I'" who lives as the light of the spirit inside each one of us "can transform the living water of the psyche into the wine of the spirit" according to Smoley on page 222 of the book quoted earlier. We can seek out the light of the essential "I" which the Cosmic Christ and the Essential Buddha as well as other spiritual beings embody. Once we see that light, we can find ourselves free of the false or no-longer-useful dogmas and beliefs which once burdened us. I find it fascinating to consider a non-literal level for the stories I have heard all of my life. Interpreting these in a symbolic way proves extremely meaningful to me.
Another of the common symbols taken from nature is water. Water has, traditionally, served as a symbol for the mother with the shrines to the goddess often located near sources of water. Even the act of Christian baptism uses water out of a font or another female womb symbol; yes, water is the symbol of love, especially the love of the mother. Water is a symbol of life itself as we know life cannot exist without water. Water has been used to symbolize the material form of the universe. Note the Atlantean and Biblical floods which destroyed material objects including humans. Water also creates--water is the essence of material life-forms. Since water symbolizes material life, it has also been used to refer to the eternal life as shown in the ancient rite of baptism. Moses is one character who is heavily involved with the symbolism of water from being placed upon the Nile, rescued from the river, parting and crossing the sea of reeds, and producing water by striking the rock with his rod. The tale of the water which flows from a rock dates back in far prehistory. Mithras produced water by shooting an arrow into a rock. A "guru at Lhasa" is, also, credited with this act as is "Atalanta of Calydon" who struck a rock "with her spear" in order to bring forth water; "Mother Rhea performed the same miracle" plus is known for producing "law tablets on a holy mountain" according to page 676 of the book entitled THE WOMAN'S ENCYCLOPEDIA OF MYTHS AND SECRETS which was written by Barbara G. Walker and published by Harper & Row in San Francisco in l983. Rocks seem to symbolize an enduring quality which serves as a foundation, a strong level of security. Stones, which could be easily carried, represent the earth which supports life, the mother; when placed upright point to the sky and its sun, stones symbolize the father. In the stories of the phallus symbols of the rod, spear, and arrow striking and entering into the womb symbol of the rock and, consequently, bringing forth water, we find the story of creation once again. In order to grow spiritually, we must move beyond the literal in order to understand the spiritual message in whatever version of a story that we read. We must move beyond the ego-self in order to understand the Self which is eternal.
I like the star as a symbol of eternity. I recall lying on the grass as a child staring up at the stars imagining all of the possibilities which life offers. Back then, in the farm areas of the Midwest, the nights were actually dark. I regret that many children do not easily step out into the dark, flop down on lush grass, and gaze into millions and billions of years ago. Think of the star as a double triangle, although, of course, it can be drawn as other geometrical shapes. This double triangle or six-pointed star represents the ongoing process of the male and female energies involved in the ongoing process of creation. This version of the star reminds us of unity, of wholeness, and of the hope we all have for Self-realization. The light of the stars, including our sun, remind us of our own possible Enlightenment. We are alive only because of the stars.
The cross has served as a powerful object since long before the time of the crucifixion of Jesus dating back to the Neolithic times. Rock carvings using the cross have been found in various places in Europe, Asia, Africa, Australia, and in both North and South America. Ishtar and Tammuz in Egypt were symbolized by the symbol of the cross. The cross symbolizes "the idea that as consciousness progresses . . . it passes through . . . different levels of being" ranging from the physical, to the psychological, to the spiritual so from the body to the ego to the "I" who is in touch with the divine according to Smoley as found on page 69. Smoley, furthermore, explains that the "horizontal line" represents human "time" (202; this horizontal pole reminds us of beginnings and endings, of birth and death, so of our mortality. One can see the vertical pole of the cross as representing mankind‘s material bodies which can stand upright pointing toward the sun in the heavens so pointing toward the son of heaven which stands for our spiritual possibilities. The vertical or spiritual line crosses the horizontal or material line so shows the spot at which we currently exist; symbolically, each human can observe his or her current position at the point where the space and time lines cross; thus, we symbolically find ourselves upon the cross. One can ponder whether his or her spot on that cross is closer to mother earth or father sky, to materialism or spirituality. When we consider the typical cross which we see on or in churches, in graveyards, on hillsides, and along roadsides, and which many of us wear upon our bodies, we see the four earthly directions of north, south, east, and west symbolized as well as the unlimited depths and heights of the universe; the wearing of the cross invokes for us all of the material or earthly and the spiritual or heavenly possibilities which each of us has available. The cross symbol is based upon the passages of the sun throughout the earthly solar year with the myths adjusted for the northern and southern hemispheres. When observing shadows, the our ancestors discovered that at the summer and again at the winter solstices when a standing stone, a totem pole, a sacred tree, or an upright object is set up the sun will cast a cross-shaped shadow; the exact shape does vary according to the latitude at which it is observed. Thus, the cross became a symbol for the sun and, eventually, for the son-god. When the sun appears to be dying in the southern sky at the Winter Solstice in the northern hemisphere, traditional celebrations were and still are held to bring back the light. The sun is reborn a few days later; the sun-god, the Christ which means the light, is born as the son of the heavens. At the spring solstice in the northern hemispheres, the sun has been fully resurrected; the sun-god is the son who is resurrected at Easter. Trees and other plants appear to spring back to life. The ground is fertile, and crops are planted. The sun is at its full power in the productive northern summers. During the northern falls, the sun falls lower in the southern sky; the dead are honored as most plants appear to die and crops are harvested. Fertility has come full circle. When the cross, with the vertical line serving as a male phallic symbol for fertility, is combined with the circle or the oval, symbols of the female, as is shown in the Celtic cross, the concept of sacred marriage is invoked. This version of the ancient symbol indicates that the essential "I" can join with the physical form--the two are one. The ancient symbols can tell even us modern people a great deal about the spiritual truths when we move beyond the literal levels. We need to use our imaginations, one of the most religious traits we possess, to envision various possibilities involved in the concrete objects we observe.
Most people, I believe, can find themselves in touch with the signs and symbols provided in the material world as well as in the legends and myths which have been passed down to us orally and, then, in writing more easily in a natural setting than inside of modern buildings. We were originally a species who lived in the outdoors. Our oldest and, undoubtedly, still most powerful connections with the spiritual truths arise from experiences which allow us to open up to the truths provided in energy-loaded places. Thankfully, many of our traditional religious sites were build at or over or under or beside areas long considered as power-giving sites. However, modern buildings for religious attendance are usually placed just where zoning and housing complexes require which may be why so many ooze forth no different atmosphere than does any gymnasium. The historical Jesus stated that where two or more gather in order to progress upon the path known as the Way, the eternal "I" of the Christ Consciousness shall be present; if it is true that the spirit called Christ, which means one who is anointed and full of the spiritual light, did incarnate so as to become the historical Jesus in order to help us, then, any group which sends forth the intention to commune with the enlightened Christ, the Living Buddha, or any of the great spiritual teachers may do so whether in a natural setting, in a high-energy setting, or in any building. Of course, the same is true for any individual who is seeking such communication. Neither the Christians, the Buddhists, the Muslims, or any other religious group has a monopoly on making contact with GOB, the Ground of Being. No matter what religion in which we profess to believe in or even if we choose not to place our trust into a religion created by humankind, we each need to find the places where we best experience a sense of the holiness of the eternal IAM.
Why do those who are enlightened bother with us who are not? They--just as do we--must love to feel the joy of expansion and of merging. I feel as if one desire that the enlightened have is to share their light of truth with others. Because such spirits are moving ever closer toward an ultimate and total bonding with the pureness of absolute, all-encompassing love, they understand that they lose nothing when they spread love but rather gain as they create even more. When the loving spirit can enable another sentient being to create love, even more love exists. While I wish that some powerful spirit could push a magical button or blow forth a powerful wind in order to make all of us suddenly give up hate and send forth love, the laws of karma do not work in such a manner. Each one of us must figure out for ourselves why and how to love ourselves and others. Thankfully, the enlightened put forth the truths for us to notice. They make themselves available so we can commune with them. Robert Crosbie, in his book entitled FRIENDLY PHILOSOPHER, which one finds quoted on page 91 of REINCARNATION: AN EAST-WEST ANTHOLOGY, which was compiled and edited by Joseph Head and S. L. Cranston and published by Aeon in Mamaroneck, New York, in 2000, explains as follows:
There is always help. . . . Always there are beings greater in evolution than we, who return to this field of physical existence to help us, to wake us up to a perception of our natures. . . . They are our Elder Brothers [and Sisters]--Jesus, for example; Buddha for another; and all those who come at different times . . . to the many different peoples. . . . They all had a common body of knowledge . . . [which they had] achieved . . . through [the methods of] observation and experience. . . . They saw the true path and followed it, as . . . must every being [at someplace and at sometime].
The great teachers who are not incarnated may choose to put forth the extreme effort to lower their vibration rates so we can hear, touch, smell, taste, or see them. What we decide to do with what we can learn remains up to us. We maintain the responsibility for our choices. Our choices make us who we are.
The universe provides us with signs and symbols of abundance and foreverness. If we can stop, look, and listen, we can absorb enough of the universal gifts that we can sense the truth of who we are: an "I" eternally connected to the ultimate wholeness of the pure form of energy which is love.
ANNE'S THOUGHTS: CHAPTER 24: Love is; where love is, happiness, peace, truth, and beauty exist.
The key purposes which I can see to existence involve enjoying this or another chosen realm and loving; where love is, happiness, truth, peace, and beauty exist. Nothing else makes any sense to me. Without love, I see only meaninglessness.
At times, I have despaired that all is meaningless. I have considered that we who hope do so uselessly. Maybe, hope arose within an early creature and proved beneficial so the evolutionary processes continues in order to allow us to feel hopeful emotions. Hope does serve an excellent function as we who are hopeful do a great deal to stay alive under extremely negative circumstances. Some lose hope regarding their physical life so give up and die. Suicides, at least, prove the end of hope for each physical body so destroyed. Most of us, thankfully, fight our way through the terrors to live yet another day. Hope for a better day than we had recently experienced convinces us to do what is necessary to continue to live.
Faith seems closely tied to hope. Jesus taught that "faith" did not refer to "adopting the correct theology but cultivating an inner attitude of surrender and openness" regarding the spiritual truths which could be done by anyone who so chose according to A HISTORY OF GOD: THE 4000-YEAR QUEST OF JUDAISM, CHRISTIANITY AND ISLAM, which was published by Gramercy Books in New York in l993 and written by Karen Armstrong, as found on page 82. The Buddha taught us that "'faith is the beginning of all good things'" which implies that "no matter what we encounter in life . . . it is faith that enables us to try again, to trust again, to love again" according to Sharon Salzberg on page xiv of her book entitled FAITH: TRUSTING YOUR OWN DEEPEST EXPERIENCE, which was publish by Riverhead Books in New York in 2002. Salzberg acknowledges that "faith entails the understanding that we don't know how things will unfold" (15) and that "faith grows only as we question what we are told, as we try teachings out by putting them into practice to see if they really work in our own lives' (48). The Buddha insisted that each one of us has to see for him- or herself what is the truth. Each of us is capable of discovering what is the essential truth. In fact, we must do so or continue to reincarnate. The teachers can stimulate us. The Universe can provide for us. However, only we can do our own learning. This is the difference between dogma--which is put forth by others who often insist we believe their truths--and faith--which each must experience for him- or herself. Faith has nothing whatsoever to do with the way most people use the word as no one else can judge or test any other individual's personal faith. Only that individual can realize the joy that comes to him or her as a result of trusting the universe and believing in love.
We have faith that we will have more good moments than horrifying ones. We have faith that if we ask sincerely we shall receive if we remain open to all of the possible ways by which we might find workable answers to our questions. We have faith that we will be able to take care of ourselves and others and that when we cannot take care of ourselves any longer that someone will take care of us. We have faith that for millions and, hopefully billions of years the day and the night will arrive, the earth will continue to revolve around the sun, and the sun will continue to send forth its light.
We have the hope and the faith that most people do not want to rob, rape, or kill us. We have the hope and the faith that most drivers do not want to ram into us. We have the faith that most leaders do not want to set off the "big one" out of fear of retaliation if for no other reason.
Each one of us possesses the absolute knowledge that only one episode will cause that individual's death. We can and do imagine all sorts of horrifying ways by which we might die. We talk of being "scared to death." Many of us flippantly state, "I could just die!" Yes any one of us could die due to any one thing at any given time: but only once will the physical body each occupies during this given life actually end its existence.
I refuse to succumb to totally pessimistic thoughts even though I realize that pessimistic people are right more than are optimistic thinkers. I have made the deliberate choice to experience the hope that a spiritual journey can be taken not just in this lifetime but beyond. I choose to maintain the faith that a spiritual element of me, the essential "I" incarnated in my physical body, will still exist after this body in which that "I" has incarnated has died. I have decided to believe in the eternalness of love, truth, peace, beauty, and happiness because I prefer hope and faith over despair, which is one defining element of faith.
I have experienced hate, anger, disgust, prejudice, despair, and other such negative emotions. I, as a result of feeling such emotions, found myself unable to grow under such heaviness. While such emotions do race through us, if we study our experiences carefully at the time that we notice that emotion, we realize the emotion itself is slightly separate and actually occurs just before the feeling which is much longer lasting and more pervasive. I have learned that far too often we chose to keep the feeling long after the original emotion has flown. Thus, we stew and fret. We let the emotions and the ensuing feelings make us question ourselves. We think of all of the phrases we could have stated. If you are like me, these "perfect' responses pop into your head during the middle of the night. We carry the burden of the negative scene which ended long ago inside of us until we decide to "just forget about it." Usually, we have to "just forget about it" again and again as I noted just last night due to my chattering mind's once again rehashing a scene which actually occurred several years ago and which was resolved in the physical world; once again, just as I am certain I will have to do in the future, I needed to process the feelings connected to the memory of the original emotion and decide to release them. Sometimes, life means letting go over and over. The negative does resurface when we are not being attentive to the now.
Think of a time when you experienced a particularly negative emotion and the follow-up feeling. No consider how you dealt with it. Let yourself visualize a scene in which an authority figure such as a parent, a teacher, a boss, or a spouse wrongly accused you of an action. Did you feel immediate rising anger? How long did that enormous emotion actually last? Did you attempt to make it last longer by replaying the scene over and over in your mind? Did you tell others who were actually located outside of the original situation about how greatly you were wronged? Did you write the scene down in a journal? How many hours, days, weeks, months, or, even, years later were/are you able to conjure up that scene in your mind? Yet, even the day that horrible event occurred, did you not experience at least a few moments during which you forgot about it until you dredged it back up out of your mind? Our memories retain the feelings which ensued out of the original emotions even though the emotion itself only existed for a brief time; therefore, when we remember that episode of our lives, we one again experience the nastiness. Since the event is over and even the emotion has ended, obviously, we have survived the situation. Now, imagine letting loose of the feelings along with the memory of the already ended emotion. Imagine the freedom involved when one can live in the moment.
Of course, the same occurs for our positive emotions. We experience a moment during which we notice something or someone beautiful. We note that golden emotional moment during which our consciousness expands so that we see ourselves just as love and as sharing that love with the earth and all of the universe or, rather, universes. Just as does the negative, that golden moment of pure positive emotion passes. We can choose to revive the feeling of happiness in such a manner that the remembering of the experience actually lasts for much longer than did the original brief emotional moment actually lasted. Gratitude for an experience can be shown by recalling it joyfully. Remember that the one choice we always have is our attitude.
We tend to confuse the emotion with the resulting feelings about that emotion. Since all true emotions only exist within our physical bodies for only a short period of time--seconds or, at the most, minutes--and since a feeling remains afterwards for, basically, as long as we choose to feel it, why should we not decide to let the negative feelings pass through us quickly and to let the positive feelings remain for much longer? As long as we are incarnated into bodies, we will experience emotions just as do all of the higher-level sentient beings. However, one of the desires of most humans is to encounter and experience every possible emotion, what one does with it and how long one holds onto the feelings surrounding it remain up to that individual. We can experience in the now and let it go if that is what we decide to do.
When I lived in my country house in Illinois, I fed two dogs each night. For years, each one received one can of food--sometimes, exactly the same brand and type and, at other times, not, depending on what I had grabbed to open. I learned to feed them about six feet apart from each other and to stand between them until each had finished hers. Once each had satisfied herself that her bowl was empty, she had to check out the other dish just in case something had been left. Recently, due to the overweight condition of Madie, I switched to just half of a can for her while Sadie still received a full can: thus, they did not finish eating at the same time. I recall a cold night when I forgot to stand between them because I wanted to hurry back inside of the house. Madie quickly finished her food and darted over to Sadie's dish. Growling, snarling, rising on the hind legs, and pretend biting ensued. The dish of remaining food was rapidly gobbled down by one of the dogs. As soon as both knew all of the food had been consumed, they dropped the fight, walked over to their dog house, cuddled up, and slept together until morning. They experienced the emotion, dealt with it without either actually being hurt, and let it go.
If dogs can drop the negative after a few seconds and live the rest of their twenty-four hours in peace, why should we not be able to do the same? I think we can learn how to do just that. I think we can learn to note the experience of the rise and fall of an emotion; we can choose
whether or not to let the ensuing feeling stay with us and, if we choose to keep it, decide for how long. We can make the decision to act upon the emotion and out of the related feelings or not to do so.
One of the secrets to acting out of the positive rather than the negative is to release the negative as quickly as one possibly can in a manner which does not injure oneself or another and to, immediately, act as if one has experienced a positive emotion. One of the methods by which this can be done is by deliberately removing a frown from one's face and replacing it with a smile. Parts of the brain do not actually know that the smile is fake so soon send out signals that the body feels happy. Sometimes, we must take additional steps including taking a walk or otherwise changing the scene in which we find ourselves. Taking deep, satisfying breaths helps, especially when we breathe in fresh air. We may need to leave the area of the negative emotional content for a period of time if that is not dangerous to ourselves or others. Think of these steps: STOP! BREATHE! SWITCH! Choose a different thought. Take a different action. Do this as many times as needed. While an actual out-loud laugh may not serve as an appropriate choice under certain situations, a smile might stimulate the other person, if someone else is directly involved, to rethink his or her response. When nothing else works, just think over and over again that this, too, shall pass. Even the pain of dying must pass.
Obviously, I have the hope that we can learn to choose the options that lead us toward moments of love. As humans, we are faced with a bombardment of choices each day. I do not believe that our ancient ancestors encountered as many choices as we do within each day. Living in a tribe consisting of a few dozen others, whom one knew quite well and to whom one was related in some manner so at least most of the time wished to protect for survival purposes of the genes, appears as quite different from living in cities consisting of thousands or even millions of people. While walking has always provided its own dangers, the ancients did not encounter vehicles constantly flying past them at sixty miles an hour. Last week, I received news that the twenty-one year old son of my second cousin was killed on a road near Aurora, Illinois, while he was walking to seek help for his car which had broken down on the road side. Such a death could not have occurred in ancient times. My brother e-mailed me concerning a school shooting in Northeastern Tennessee. He had served as a school psychologist in that district for the last several years and knew the teenager who shot three principals. The wife of the administrator who died teaches in my sister-in-law's building. Again, no deaths due to guns happened in ancient times. We have invented new ways to die.
Of course, our distant ancestors gossiped. I suspect that when I can spend time with Steve, my brother, and Becky, his wife, that we will discuss or, actually, as I must admit, gossip, about the school shootings, the road accident, and other dangerous situations we as well as those we know have encountered. However, those old-time ancestors did not become emotionally involved in the made-up lives of characters in movies and television shows. They heard news concerning an occurrence at a distant spot on an occasional basis when a visitor appeared or two tribes encountered each other but did not know on a 24-7 basis who did what to whom on the other side of the world, or even more scary, who might do what. For example, the entire time while I retyped this chapter, I have been listening to and, occasionally, watching new on CNN. I have just spent hours being bombarded by news--the buzz--the happenings. I know that was my choice. I can reach the remote control and use it with one hand while typing with the other. I admit that I like the background noise during the day. I like to know what is going on. I must admit like a certain amount of gossip, although much less than I used to do. However, I find a deeper level of calmness when I turn off the noise. For months at a time, I choose to obtain most of my news or gossip by checking the internet during just a few minutes a day. I can and do decide what makes me happy, just as can each of us.
When emotions appeared within humans, they were meant to enable us to save a life, our own or another; to produce, care for, and raise the healthy young; to nurse the sick and elderly, and to, otherwise, stimulate ourselves to do what must be done. Feelings connected to emotions certainly have proven to be useful when used wisely. The feeling of being scared of the place where one had encountered a dangerous animal, reptile, insect, or whatever would have prevented one from spending time there. The emotional attachment one felt towards an infant lead to caring for him or her during all of the needed years, at least until adulthood. The love, respect, and thankful feelings felt for an adult who had helped to raise and teach oneself would enable him or her to care for that elderly person when she or he found him- or herself in need. Bonding beyond sexual acts for procreation lead to sharing of meat, nuts, grains, and other foods as well as grooming which keeps one healthy due to removal of ticks, fleas, lice, and other such problems. The emotions and resulting feelings created by sexual pleasure experienced with a certain person led to long-term relationships which can strengthen a community. Just having someone available to watch for danger while the other one sleeps allows for pleasant emotions. While I certainly do not imagine that the early humans who existed in the years after the appearance of the first homo sapiens enjoyed an ideally easy life, I do believe they had not yet developed the modern version of the complex ego-self with its accompanying chattering "monkey brain" so were able to remain much more in touch with their authentic emotions than we modern humans find ourselves doing most of the time. I believe, based on my observations of animals, that our ancient ancestors or at least those who lived before the discovery and implementation of agricultural techniques and the resulting villages and cities, chose to live in the immediate now more often than we moderns usually manage to do.
We cannot return to what once was; we should not even wish to do so. We are spirits who live in bodies at this time. We can, however, understand how our emotions developed and how we experience them. We can experiment with our feelings and not be merely victims of what we feel. We can choose what thoughts we want to think. We can learn how to turn off our repetitive "monkey mind" in order to control what we think. We can notice that our thoughts make us who we are. We can decide who we want to be. We can slip under our thinking minds which control our bodies to discover our eternal spirit, the "I" which, always, urges us to choose the most loving and compassionate path.
Since we are capable of thinking about and acting out of love, it seems logical to me that we are capable of making ourselves into the most loving selves possible. Of course, we are, also, capable of experiencing the negative emotions and their resulting feelings. Thus, whether we make ourselves into creatures who hate or creatures who love remains our choice. I know what I have and will continue to choose.
How can I define love? My nephew Douglas suggested to me that love is, ultimately, the bonding between the two smallest forms of energy so the word love refers to that which holds matter together. Based upon this theory, each form taken by energy ranging from the smallest to the largest so including the universe itself must consist of love. Therefore, we consist of love. We can never be separated from love.
Aldous Huxley, in the introduction to THE FIRST AND LAST FREEDOM based upon the work of J. Krishnamurti, which was published by Harper and Row in New York in l954, explained love as follows: Love is love. . . . Love is its own eternity; it is the real, the supreme, the immeasurable." The great IAM is just what love is--reality forever. There is not a beginning and there is not an end to love.
Since I can decide for myself, I choose to make the most loving choice whenever I can do so. How do I know what love means? I experience. Ultimately, I see the loving choice as the one leading towards the most beauty.
LOVE! TRUTH! PEACE! BEAUTY! SEEK THESE. BE THESE.
ANNE'S THOUGHTS: CHAPTER 25: Spirituality differs from religious activities.
Religion refers to an institution, a communal project with rules and codes, doctrines and dogmas. Spirituality refers to what happens to an individual within him- or herself. Religion refers to the rituals we choose to use to discover our spiritual selves. Spirituality refers to who we are essentially and how we decide to act in the world. The best efforts to express one's love involve compassion which means moving beyond oneself.
Whenever we speak of anything other than that which can be scientifically proven, we must use our imagination, our creative talent, which, as far as we know, only humans, out of all of the earthly creatures, possess. When we try to force our images, our visions, onto or into others, we deny them the right to create for themselves. We can share what we have imagined; however, danger involves acting in a dictatorial manner. Robert Allen makes an excellent point on page 303 of his book entitled A THOUSAND PATHS TO ZEN, which was published in London by MQP in 2003: "Why can't people leave religion alone and go looking for God instead?". All that anyone has ever said about what some call God must be recognized as just words, the effable, which that person used to describe how she or he envisioned the indescribable, the ineffable. In truth, the ultimate can only be spoken of in symbols, analogies, parables, myths, etcetera which point toward a conception that one person had created. Whenever one finds oneself caught up in doctrines, rules, codes, or laws which involve what Paul Tillich called the "ground of being," she or he might find him or herself better off tossing all of that which someone else has created aside in order to move beyond his or her own as well as the other person's thinking in order to contemplate that which is beyond or under or within the reality which we humans can sense. The fundamental truth is that we can only decide for ourselves.
I was raised in the United Methodist Church. My brother Stephen is an ordained minister out of the Methodist tradition having graduated with a Masters Degree in Divinity. My son Jonathan has passed through stages of modern atheism, into agnosticism, and, finally, into the shaman traditions due to following his own path into the truth. I have cousins who have joined existing evangelistic churches. I have other cousins who have started and now run their own evangelistic churches. I have a friend who is a born-again Pentecostal. I have friends who are Roman Catholic. I have a friend who is Eastern Orthodox. I have friends who are agonistics. I have friends who are atheists. I have friends who do not have the slightest idea of what they are. One of my favorite teachers belongs to the Hindu tradition. I have attended the Universal Unitarian Church which I enjoyed very much. I belong to the Theosophical Society which traces its history back to the Perennial Philosophy. I have joined the Secular Humanists so read their literature as well as the Skeptical Inquirer, the magazine for science and reason. I belong to the One Spirit book club. I love to read about and talk with people who have differing beliefs from mine. I love to read concerning all types of beliefs. I want to expand what I know so as to better decide what I believe.
One of the problems that I have with any organized so institutionalized religion regards how the truth is taught. I agree with Robert Allen whom I previously quoted: "Religion is taught so badly that people either end up believing a silly fairytale or end up not believing it. What good is that? In either case God gets ignored" (295). I decided that I did not want to believe the literal versions of "the silly fairytales" any longer. My childhood had ended. I decided that I had to think for myself. If there is a god who cares about me, that god gave me a brain which I have found to be quite capable of providing me with the ability to reflect upon the meaning of life.
I do not want anyone else insisting that I believe any given concept. I do not insist that anyone else believe what I believe. I want each person to explore, ponder, and choose for him- or herself.
ANNE'S FINAL THOUGHTS
Every sentence you just read pertains to my opinion at the time I wrote it. I could be right on target. I could be full of nonsense. If you contact me, at that time, I might have a different thought. After all, I am just a form taken by energy which constantly changes.
Yet, I believed what I wrote at the time I wrote it. Would I change a few things? I already did before providing you with a printed form of my beliefs. Would I change much? No way.
I encourage you to write out what you believe. Do not use any references. Do not write what you think you are supposed to believe. Explore yourself. Socrates was right when he taught us to "know yourself." Find out who you are.
Decide what you believe.
Decide what changes you might want to deliberately make regarding how you tell your story.
Move yourself in the direction you desire.
Expose your thoughts for others to consider.
Free yourself from the constraints of needing someone else's approval.
Think for yourself.
Enjoy your journey.
Just do it.
Just love yourself and others.
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October 2008 
Grannie Annie
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